#I WISH TO BE DISTURBED AND SURPRISED EVEN MORE AS WE CONTINUE

[this-is-fox-speaking]

[trippinsorrows]

looking through your eyes + twenty one

authors note: good lord, ya'll was in a frenzy following that last one. hope this provides some clarity and closure.

cw/tw: angst, solana being very upset, and smut

song inspo: ‘looking through your eyes’ by leann rimes

gif belongs to @romanreigns

masterlist +story playlist + taglist request form

words: 8k

Solana’s cried a lot in the past month.

More than she’s probably ever cried in her life.

But the past few hours have to be the heaviest bout she’s experienced since her mother was killed. 

Everything hearts. Her head. Her body. Her heart.

She’s confused and angry and scared and nervous and so many different emotions at once that all she wants to do is scream, but she can’t even do that, because she has nothing left in her. She spent the night crying her eyes out, sleeping a little, then crying her eyes out some more. So much so that she’d be surprised if she got a good two consistent hours of sleep.

She just feels so empty. Like everything she thought she knew is now no more. Because it isn't. Because the man she thought Roman was has turned out to be exactly who he is. Not the….version he showed her. And she feels so stupid, so naive. She gave him so much, exposed so much of herself to him, loved him, and what has it gotten her?

The epic, incurable sting of betrayal.

And a part of her didn’t want to believe it, wanted to believe that maybe it’s not what she thought, but what was said was pretty self-explanatory. And if that wasn’t enough pressing evidence, the fact that Roman kept calling and texting her afterwards, probably realizing the phone was still connected, was the nail in the coffin.

Proof that he knew fucked up.

That he was caught.

That she now knows the truth about their marriage. About it all.

Solana couldn’t bear seeing his name continue to pop up on her phone, resulting in her just turning the damn thing off. 

She doesn’t want to talk to him, doesn’t want to see him, doesn’t want anything from him.

Just thinking about it makes the heavy lump in the back of her throat throb. She’s so tired of crying. Tired of it all.��

Turning over in her bed, a part of her wishes she hadn’t asked to cancel her therapy appointment with Gail, citing that she was feeling physically unwell. That’s not a lie, but Gail would be the perfect person to speak to right now. If only she had it in her to talk. But, she doesn’t. She has no words for what she still doesn’t fully understand. 

A knock on the door disturbs her from her depressing thoughts. Solana shifts in the bed, calling out in a weak voice, “I want to be alone right now.”

Bautista’s deep voice sounds on the other side of the door. “It’s a wellness check.”

Solana shuts her eyes. She should have known this was coming. She was practically silent during breakfast and retreated back to her room in that same silence, which was bound to garner a visit from staff to make sure she’s okay. 

With a heavy sigh, she kicks the blankets off and intentionally avoids looking at her reflection in the large mirror anchored on top of the dresser. She’s certain she’d hate what would be looking back at her.

Using the back of her hand to wipe at her eyes, Solana takes a deep breath and turns the knob, opening the door, expecting to see a nurse or maybe even Gail. 

But, she’s wrong. 

So wrong.

Because it’s neither of those women. Not even Bautista.  Instead, standing before her is none other than the one person she doesn’t want to see. At all.

Shaking her head, nose turned up, Solana goes to close the door. “I have nothing to say to you—” But, she should know better, know that Roman is not the man to ever be denied.

He reaches out his arm, putting an abrupt, effective stop. “We need to talk.”

Knowing there’s no way in hell she’ll win the battle for the door, she instead reaffirms her position. “I don’t want to talk to you.”

Solana turns away, heading back for her bed when she hears the door shut and footsteps. 

“Baby—”

“No!” She snaps, twisting around and jumping away from Roman as he tries to reach for her arm. “Don’t—don’t call me that. You’re a liar.”

It’s only now that he’s a bit closer, and she’s actually looking at him, that she sees just how….different he looks. Concerned. Worried. Scared, almost. “Solana, would you just listen to me?”

“Why?” She demands. “So you can tell me more lies?” Solana was all but certain she cried out all the tears in her body last night, yet standing in front of Roman, just looking at him, makes her sick. Makes her sad.

Makes her angry.

He swallows, tone dripping with anguish. “It’s not what you think—”

“Were you working?” It’s a simple question. One that should elicit a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answer right away, but instead Roman just looks at her with that same wounded expression. With a tinge of something else. Guilt.

“Exactly.”

“Solana—” Again he tries to reach for her, and again she moves away. She doesn’t even want to be in the same room with him right now, let alone have him touch her.

“No!” She shouts, hating this. Hating all of it. The hurt. The betrayal. It’s disgusting to her. “I trusted you! I trusted you more than anyone, and you lied to me. You said you’d never lie to me. You said—you said you’d never hurt me, and that’s exactly what you’ve done!”

If not for the heaviness for this situation, Solana would be floored by how expressive Roman is being right now. No stoic, unreadable expression. Just a man who looks like he’s been slapped in the face. Like her words are more of a physical assault on him than any injury he’s ever received. 

Sniffling, she takes her hand and wipes at her eyes. She can only imagine how red and puffy they must be from all the crying she’s done the past twenty–four hours. “I know that—that I’ve been a lot, but you didn’t—if you didn’t want me—if you didn’t want to be with me—”

“Don’t you ever fucking say that,” he cuts her off with all the swiftness. His voice taking on an almost angry tone. Like he’s offended she could even fix her lips to say that. “Of course, I want to be with you.”

But, she’s not listening, Solana instead slips into the spiraling she’s done all night. That lane of self-blame. “I know—I know that I haven’t been the best wife, that I’ve been here,” she gestures around the room and points to herself, “but I’m trying—I’ve been trying.” It’s a cascade of emotions that have spilled out of whatever semblance of resolve and border she had around herself. All of her insecurities falling out in the open for him to see. “I’m trying.” She breaks down, hands covering her face as she cries into her palms. Sobs that wreck her body and make her legs feel so weak. 

But, it’s when she feels him directly in front of her, his arms around her that she shakes her head and drops her hands. “Don’t touch me!” Solana shouts, trying to push him away. But, he doesn’t budge, just continues to hold her. “Déjame en paz! ¡Te odio!” Solana progresses to angrily beating on his chest to get him away, but he says nothing, does nothing. “Te odio…..” Just continues to let her throw all of her hurt and anger at him until her fists grow just as tired as her resolve, Solana eventually falling and crying into his chest. 

Roman carefully lifts her up and carries her over to the bed, laying her down and not wasting a second to lie beside her, gathering her into his arms yet again and positioning her on his chest.

It’s such a confusing experience. She wants him to leave, but she wants him to stay. She hates him touching her, but she craves being close to him. He disgusts her, but she finds herself clutching onto him.

She hates him, but oh how she loves him. 

Solana cries until there’s nothing left, depleting her body of nearly all of its energy.  Her red eyes are open and focused on nothing in particular as Roman rubs soothing circles on the small of her back. But, it’s only when they’ve been submerged in radio silence for nearly ten minutes that he finally speaks.

Voice low and borderline hoarse. “I didn’t cheat on you, Solana.” There’s not much left in her to offer any sort of response other than the lump in the back of her throat pulsing. Throbbing. Trying to recharge for the next breakdown. “But….but I haven’t been honest with you either.”

She doesn’t want to talk to him. Doesn’t want anything from him. And yet, she finds herself asking, “where were you?”

“I can’t tell you.” Solana closes her eyes and shoots up, moving to get out the bed, away from him, But, Roman is faster, grabbing her by her waist and angling her, so that she’s looking at him. His eyes are soft and damn near pleading. Desperate. “Because I want to show you.”

—-----------

Solana hasn’t a clue how she ended up in this position. 

Sitting in the passenger seat of an SUV, Roman in the driver’s seat, driving them to a destination unknown but one that’s clearly not anywhere close to home considering it’s been almost two hours, and they still haven’t arrived to wherever it is he’s taking her.

She shouldn’t have agreed. Shouldn’t have allowed him to convince her to acquiesce so easily. Shouldn’t have let him inform Dr. Stratus and Gail that she’ll be gone for a day or two. Shouldn’t have packed her small bag and climbed in the escalade and allowed him to guide her to this unknown place.

Solana just hates it all. It’s why she hasn’t said a word to him. Not a single one. She just sits in her seat, body angled to the window, earbuds plugged in playing music that resonates so deeply with all of her emotions right now.

Every now and then, the feelings will brew, and she’ll have to quickly wipe away the silent tears, praying he doesn’t see them.

Though, she’s certain he does. 

She slips in and out of surface leveled sleep for the majority of the ride but is eventually woken up by Roman lightly shaking her shoulder. His expression is still soft, his voice calm, “we’re here.” 

Blinking back into awareness, Solana wipes at her eyes and looks around, seeing the car is indeed parked. Her passenger door is open, Roman waiting patiently for her to get out. 

She unbuckles her seatbelt, mouth dropping open when she sees they’re in the middle of a forest. Nothing but greenery surrounding them and the beautiful house that seems tucked away from it all. Solana is starting to wish she’d stayed awake. Turning to Roman, she asks, “where—where are we?”

He doesn’t say anything, just motions for her to follow him. And for some reason, she does. She doesn’t push him more, just stays close behind him as he walks up the stairs of the home and pulls out a key, unlocking the front door. 

Roman steps to the side and motions for her to walk in first. Again, she says nothing, just silently follows his directions, mind still racing about everything that’s happened as well as just what in the hell is going on.

Stepping into the home, Solana’s mouth naturally falls open. The interior is beautiful, warm in color, almost naturistic with the design. It feels warm and cozy and welcoming. Like a safe space for any and all who happen to venture into the literal house in the woods. 

Roman suddenly calls out, speaking in a language she doesn’t understand. Samoan, if she had to take a guess. Him doing so, however, makes her even more nervous. 

Are they not alone?

Now, she needs to know. Needs to have her questions answered. She grabs his arm, ignoring the sparks that fly at touching him. “Roman, what is goi—”

“And he says that I’m the one with the memory problems.” Solana overhears the almost aged voice of a woman, a voice that’s very much unlike the one she heard over the phone. “atalii o le uso, were you not just over—here?”

Solana’s gaze sets on the woman. She’s up in age, that much is obvious. Tanned complexion, warm brown eyes, her hair long and a beautiful combination of salt, pepper, and a brunette color. She’s a little on the heavier side, Solana taking note of the almost limp she walks with as well the disfiguration on both her arms. 

Burns. 

However, when her gaze switches from Roman to herself, Solana sees the woman smile brightly. A smile that’s eerily similar to the man standing beside her. 

“Well, it’s about damn time.” Solana is still trying to process just what’s going on when the woman walks over to her, eyes squinting with curiosity. “Such a beautiful girl.” Solana freezes initially when the woman pulls her in for a hug. Warm and friendly. Just like the atmosphere of the home. It’s…..comforting almost. 

The other woman is the first to end the hug, though her friendly expression remains focused on Solana “Hi….” Meanwhile, Solana remains abundantly lost in this situation. “I’m—”

“Oh, child. I know exactly who you are.” She waves off Solana’s introduction, almost playful gaze switching to Roman. “But, something tells me you don’t know who I am.”

At all. 

“Solana.” It’s then that Roman steps forward,  gesturing to the older woman. “This is Fetu.” He swallows, something flashing in his eyes. “My aunt.”

The past twenty-four hours have been filled with nothing but bombshells, but this one has to take the cake. Solana’s mouth is ajar, her gaze bouncing back and forth between the two. She sees it now. The same smile. Same eyes. The burns.

Similar to Roman’s. The ones he received the night his family was killed, family that included an aunt, according to him.

This…..this can’t be her….right? 

A different one maybe who coincidentally has the same type of injuries Roman sustained that night…..maybe.

Or not.

But how?

Completely taken back, she finds herself asking him, “your…..your aunt?” 

Fetu says something in what she would guess is Samoan. Roman sighs, loudly, looking over at Solana, expressing quietly, “I’ll explain later.”

That’s…..that’s very much appreciated, because Solana has so many questions.

“Men.” Fetu rolls her eyes. “They have such horrible timing.” Her gaze shifts for a second as she focuses on Solana. “Child, have you been crying?” That seems like an understatement. Again, Fetu speaks in Samoan, voice suddenly angry as she slaps Roman on the arm. “I’ll deal with you later.” She switches English and goes to move her arm around Solana, “come. I was just about to prepare dinner. Roman said you like to cook?”

At that, Solana’s eyes light up a bit. “I–I do.”

“Good, then you won’t mind helping this old lady, now, will you?” It’s not really posed as a question. More of a directive, Solana briefly glances back at Roman as she’s guided away from him. He simply gives her a nod of reassurance and disappears through the door they just walked through.

—--------

Solana likes Fetu. It’s a bit of a strong statement considering she’s known her for less than 24 hours, 12 hours even. But, it’s true.

Roman’s aunt is kind and funny. A spitfire who keeps a smile on her face the entire time they’re in the kitchen cooking together, the older woman so patient as she explains each step of the traditional Samoan dish they’re preparing. 

Solana is washing the dishes, with only a few left when Fetu calls her from where she sits at the kitchen table. Solana grabs the towel and dries off her hands, tossing it on the counter as she walks over.

“Yes ma’am?”

“Oh please, I know I’m ancient, but don’t make me feel like it.” Solana smiles and sits down in the chair on the adjacent side of the table. Fetu’s eyes are focused on Solana in a studying manner, a small chuckle leaving her mouth. “I see it.” 

Understandably, Solana is confused, asking in a small voice. “See what?”

“The light.” She answers, returning the smile. “Roman refers to you as his light. I didn’t understand then, but I do now. I see it now.”

Solana sits there, silenced and taken back for the 19th time today. “He….he calls me that?”

She nods, eyes twinkling with curiosity. “Among other things.” Solana would love to know just what those things are, but there’s something she wants—needs—to know more. A confirmation, really. 

“Was—was Roman here with you this weekend?” A question she’s been wondering from the moment Roman introduced her to his aunt, the only thing confusing her being the voices. Fetu is most definitely not the woman she heard on the phone. Her voice is too aged and scratchy. 

“He was,” she confirms, and Solana’s stomach drops. “A surprise but welcomed, nonetheless.”

Meanwhile, Solana is doing her best to regulate her breathing and not freak out on this poor, old woman. “I—was someone else here too?”

Fetu nods. “My younger cousin, Ava, stays with me as well, because apparently I need a caretaker.” She rolls her eyes, explaining, “she’s out taking care of some personal business but will be back shortly. I can’t wait for you two to…..is everything alright, child?”

Far from it. Solana doesn’t even need to ask any more questions, because certain pieces are coming together. The truth is gradually revealing itself to be something entirely different from what she thought it was.

“No,” Solana answers with a surprising level of honesty. “I—I really messed something up.”

“Does it have to do with Roman?” Silently nodding, Fetu makes a sound. “I see…..” She reaches over, placing a hand over Solana’s. “Solana, I know that all of this must be confusing to you, and it’s clear while I’ve been asking my nephew to meet you, today was not planned, and I’m guessing it wasn’t from anything good.” Solana says nothing, silent tears falling down her face. “And there’s much I wish to discuss with you once you know the full story, but let me just say this.” She gives a gentle squeeze. “There’s no one on this earth who my nephew cares about more than you. You have completely changed his life, brought out a side of him I thought they killed, that died that awful, awful night.” Solana gasps quietly, stuck on both the words as well as indirect confirmation that this is the same aunt she believed was killed with the rest of his family. “I know he can be difficult at times. Stubborn. Hardheaded. A closed book, but….you must understand the massive weight he carries. Even as a boy, they put so much pressure on him to be perfect.” She shakes her head, eyes glistening with unshed tears. “That’s why he kept him away from him, because I always just let him be a kid. Be human.” 

There’s continued confusion at the he part, but Solana doesn’t want to interrupt, doesn’t want to pry too much. Especially since there’s a not so light conversation she still needs to have with her cousin.

“Roman calls you his light because you are. Whether he’s ready to admit it or not, he needs you, and something tells me you need him just as much.” Truer words have never been spoken, “so whatever it is that happened, I can promise you it’s nothing you two can’t work through, because he’d do anything for you, especially if it’s to keep you.” 

By the end of it, Solana has a fresh set of tears, the beautiful words from someone who clearly knows Roman, and knows him well, meaning the world to her. 

The same way he does.

Even if…..even if her behavior earlier indicated otherwise. 

It’s why…..why she needs to make this right.

“Thank you,” she manages through the emotionality of it all. “That….that means a lot to me.” Because it does. More than Fetu could ever know. Clearing her throat, she stands up and dusts off her pants, sharing, “I think…..I think I need to go talk to Roman.”

Fetu chuckles softly. “I think you do too.” She motions with her hand. “Up the stairs. Last room on the right.”

Solana smiles appreciatively. “Thank you.”

The older woman says nothing else as Solana finds her legs carrying her to the dark staircase, up to the second level and down the hall to the room Fetu identified as belonging to Roman.

She starts to knock before entering but ultimately decides against it. They’re way past that point.

So, she opens the door, quietly closing it behind her when she hears Roman’s deep voice from a bit of the distance given the size of the bedroom. He’s in the bathroom ,on the phone, speaking in a different language. It doesn’t sound Samoan. Maybe Italian.

Regardless, she moves over and sits on the edge of the bed, patiently waiting for him to walk out while also wondering just what in the hell she’s going to say. Sorry, of course, but what more? That can’t be enough. Not with how she acted. The lack of trust in him and their relationship completely shelved to the side, replaced with her borderline irrational behavior. 

She didn’t even give him a chance to speak.

Just the thought of how unfair she treated him bringing another set of tears to her eyes at the same moment the bathroom door opens, revealing a shirtless Roman, dark sweatpants resting low on his hips, hair down and clearly in the midst of air drying given its voluminous state. If not for the nature of why she’s here, of what transpired, she’d be distracted at him in such a state.

But, that’s not the focus. She doesn’t care about that right now. 

She just cares about him.

About making this right.

And the minute Roman’s gaze sets on her, he says something quickly and lowly, followed by him hanging up the phone. He places it atop the dresser near him, eyes never leaving her. “Solana, what’s—”

He’s silenced when she hops up from the bed and rushes over to him, practically throwing her body into his, holding him. Tight.

“I’m sorry,” she cries, uncaring about any sort of plan she had regarding how to tackle this. How to make this right. She simply just needs him to know how sorry she is. “I shouldn’t have said those things—I didn’t mean—”

“Solana, it’s okay.” Him holding the back of her head with such tenderness is an equal match to the gentle way he’s speaking to her right now. Undeserved in her opinion.

“No,” she forces out. Pulling back, she shakes her head. “I was—I was mean to you, and—and I didn't trust you.” He’s always been so good to her. It’s almost embarrassing to Solana how easily she could believe he could do something like that to her. “You didn’t deserve t–that.”

Roman, however, simply looks down at her with an almost nervous expression. “You weren’t entirely wrong, Solana. I was lying to you. Like Ava said, I’ve been lying to you.” He lightly taps on her hip and motions for her to follow him as he sits on the edge of the bed. Solana is right beside him, one leg up on the mattress, the other on the ground. “Fetu…..”

And just like that, she knows where he’s going. Knows what he’s about to share.

Truth be told, the past twenty four hours have been such a whirlwind of emotions that she’s not even sure this is the right time to be having this conversation, but it’s one that needs to be had. Whether she wants to or not.  Because she’d rather not. Rather not put Roman through any more unnecessary stress than she already has. “Ro, you—you don’t—”

“Someone dragged me out of the house. I never found out who.” Interrupting her, his voice is eerily similar to the first night he opened up about his family, about that night when so much was lost. “But, I—I couldn’t just stand there and let my family die. So, I ran back in.” Her chest tightens, listening to him recall such a harrowing night. “There was so much smoke and fire, and I don’t know how the hell I got to her, but I did. She was hurt and burned, but she could walk, so I guided us both out, but I got burned too in the process.” Fetu. He has to be talking about Fetu.

It’s hard for her to imagine him. An innocent 10 year old boy who’d just lost his family in the most horrific way still doing what he can to help. To save them. To save her.

Solana naturally moves closer to Roman, holding onto his arm, her thumb soothingly running over his tattoos. 

“I wanted—” He closes his eyes, and for the first time in maybe ever, Solana can see and hear the visceral emotions in his voice. “I tried to go back in there, but one of the firefighters restrained me, and I was too weak and injured to fight back. I ended up passing out shortly after that.”

“Roman….”

He continues, hard gaze focused on the intricate design of the large rug on the floor. “When I came to, they told me everyone was dead. Including Fetu. That she’d died from her injuries.” 

Solana gasps. 

What?

They….lied to him?

Roman, however, just continues to recall his trauma, expression still blank, voice betraying all of the emotions brewing beneath the surface. “So, for years, I worked to accept the fact that I was alone, because at the end of the day, Jimmy and Jey still have Rikishi. They had their brothers and mother. Rikishi had his own family. Everyone did. Except me, cause mine was all dead.” 

There’s something so heartbreaking about hearing that. Solana thinking back on how she felt the first time he opened up about his family’s murder. He’s right. They might all be blood related, but they each have their own family units. 

Roman’s, however, was taken from him.

“Then, when I turned 21, Rikishi finally told me the truth. That she was alive and had been living in hiding all those years. He was the only one who knew.” It’s the part she was still confused about that his continued explanation touches on, providing an answer but also something else. 

Anger.

“Why?” Solana cuts in, unable to help herself. “Why would he keep that from you? Why so long? Why at all?”

Why would he keep an innocent child away and separated from the closest family member he had left? That just sounds so….cruel.

Roman swallows, a dark, emotionless chuckle leaving his voice. “Said he was worried she’d make me weak. He wanted to be sure my training was effective, hence why he waited a couple years after I became Tribal Chief to make sure I could still handle the truth and be what they made me to be.”

Solana thinks back to her conversation with Fetu. Rikishi must be the he she was referring to.

Roman, however, keeps sharing, opening up more than she would have ever expected. “I don’t—I can’t come see her as much as I’d like to, because I don’t want to put her safety at risk.” That makes so much sense. All the sense. To keep her safe, he has to keep his distance. “But, when…..when I need to get away and clear my head, or I just need someone to talk to, I come see her.”

Solana thinks back to something, a few months ago when Roman up and disappeared for almost a week. “That’s where you went that one time…..you came here to see her?” He nods. She would have never in a million years guessed this. Guessed that Roman’s safe space is with the one person he probably needs the most but can only have in small doses. 

It’s almost inconceivable to her that his own family could do that to him. To a child. To deprive an innocent child of the only, close family they have left. To keep them separated so he wouldn’t be weak. 

It makes her heart heavy. 

It  only gets heavier though with the next thing that comes out of his mouth. “She was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s last year.” Another devastating, crushing blow. “Some visits, she knows who I am. Others….I’m a complete stranger.”

“Oh my God…..” Roman lost her as a child, regained her as a man and is now having to intermittently experience that loss over and over again. It's so cruel and entirely unfair to someone who truly deserves the world.

She can’t imagine what that’s like for him. 

It’s like Roman is reading her thoughts, his next explanation touching on some of her questions and thoughts.

“Fetu is….she’s always been like a mother to me. My own mother….that was…..complicated.” She believes it. Doesn’t know how, but she just does. “Fetu was the only person—before you—to ever tell me that she loves me.” Solana’s heart simply breaks all over again, because just when she thought it couldn’t get any worse, it does.

While her father never once uttered those sacred words, Nina never let a day pass without both verbalizing and showing her daughter all the purest love in the world. Solana almost finds it inconceivable that Roman’s parents truly never expressed loving him. But, when she thinks about it, it makes sense. 

His aloofness. His stoicism. It’s not just because of the titles he holds. It’s because of the upbringing he had. 

The lack of care and nurturance.

The lack of love.

Outside of Fetu.

“Solana….” His voice again takes on a desperate, almost foreboding tone. “Outside of myself, Ava, and Rikishi, the twins are the only ones who know about Fetu. Not even Paul knows. I know…..I know Naomi and Bayley are your friends, but—”

“Roman.” She brings her hands to his face, eyes locked with his. “I swear to you on my mother’s grave that I will never tell a soul. Ever.” And she means that with every fiber of her being. Nothing about what has and will be experienced will leave her mouth unless it’s through discussion with Roman herself. Not even the twins, even if they do know about Fetu. “And I’m—I’m so sorry I put you in this position. Where you felt like you had to tell me. If—if I knew—”

“But, you didn’t,” he cuts in, admitting. “And a part of me wants to be upset with you that you didn’t trust me, but the truth is I would be a hypocrite, because I haven’t been honest with you either.”

She wants to tell him that he doesn’t have to keep talking, that he’s been vulnerable enough, but something tells her not to. Tells her that he needs to get this out.

And she’s glad she doesn’t stop him, because his next confession nearly blows her away.

“I’ve—I’ve been struggling, Solana.” Her shoulders slump and frown deepens. “Ever since—ever since you tried—” he doesn’t say what, but he doesn’t have to either. She knows exactly what he’s talking about. “I’m a fucking mess without you. I think about you all the fucking time. The thought of anything happening to you scares the shit out of me.” Roman Reigns admitting to being scared of something, anything, let alone losing her, is something she could have never predicted. But, it’s exactly what he’s saying, and it nearly breaks her heart. “So much that when I read your letter, my initial answer was no, because I wanted you home with me. Because I miss having you around. I want—I need you around.” Her eyes shut, for so many different reasons. “I need you”

“And I need you to know that I would never cheat on you, Solana. Ever.” Tears forming again, she opens her eyes and her mouth to apologize again, but she can’t because he has to continue with the confessions.  “I love you too much to do that to you.” Her breathing is halted, focus centering in on the words that just left his mouth or didn’t leave his mouth, because Solana is all of a sudden questioning her hearing. There’s no way he just….no. “But, I—I don’t know how to love you either.”

It feels like there should be some type of cap on newfound, previously unbelievable things being dropped on a person, because Solana is at her absolute max. The past twenty-four hours have been a whirlwind, but this….this has to take the cake. 

Roman….loves her? 

The tears are definitely falling now. She’s more or less speechless, overcome by the emotionality of it all. “Ro….” 

“I don’t know how to love and be with you and still be the Tribal Chief and the Head of the Table and the Capo and every other fucking perfect thing I have to be all the fucking time.” His voice becomes increasingly bitter with each word that leaves his mouth, the full extent of the weight he carries all the time being laid out in the open for her to dissect and process.

This is the last place she expected their conversation to go, but that’s a moot point. What matters is that they’re here, and the last thing she wants to do is discourage him from being open and honest with her. She can’t imagine how difficult it must have been for him. 

Solana stands up and  moves in front of Roman, lowering herself onto his lap, bringing her hands to his face. “I don’t need you to be perfect. I never have, and I never will. I don’t need you to be the Tribal Chief or the Head of the Table. Or anything else.” She moves her hand to his chest, over his heart, speaking firmly yet gently. “I just need you to be my Roman.”

His gaze visibly softens. Relief. Happiness. Fear.

“And you say….you say you don’t know how to love me, but….what do you think you’ve been doing?” She smiles, head tilted.  “All this time, I’ve just been thinking how you are with me is because you care about me, and you do, but it’s much deeper than that. It’s because….it’s because you love me, Ro. I think…..I think you’ve loved me for a while. The same way that I’ve loved you for a while, We just….it took us a while to catch on.”

Because what Solana is now realizing is that the love has always been there. For him. For her. Always there. Lying dormant, waiting for both of them to step into the space of realization.

“And the honest truth is that I don’t know how to love you either. I just know that there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you and no one else I want to be with.” If it’s not Roman, she doesn’t want it. He’s her forever. “So, here’s what we’re going to do.” Smiling softly, she pushes back some of his hair.  “I’m going to love you, and you’re going to love me. We’re not going to question it, not think too much about how to do it and just do it.”

Because what is also true is that clearly neither of them had the best, healthiest examples of love and what a healthy marriage looks like. So, they have to make it their own. Trial and error. Living and learning. Knowing that at the end of the day, what matters most is their love for one another. 

“And you’re going to talk to me, the same way you let me talk to you, because what I do know is that people who love each other help each other out. You help me so much, more than you’ll probably ever know. Now it’s my turn to return the favor, okay?” 

That might even be the thing that Solana needs the most. Needs him to know that he’s not alone. He has her. He’ll always have her. 

“I’ll—I’ll try.” Roman nods, and Solana closes her eyes. That’s all she needs. All she’ll ever need. 

Pressing a tender kiss to his forehead. She tries to move off his lap when he just so slightly holds her, preventing the separation. “What’s—”

“Can—” He swallows, an almost nervous hint to his deep, usually confident voice. “Can I make love to you?”

It’s not a question she was expecting. Not in the slightest. But, her answer is an obvious one. Solana gets up to stand directly in front of him. Moving her hands to the waistband of her pants, she pushes them down her legs, stepping out, kicking the material to the side. 

Her fingers then move to the bottom of her shirt as she lifts it over her head, also tossing it to the side. Her eyes never leaving his, Solana reaches behind and unclasps her bra, breast falling freely at the same time her bra also tumbles to the ground. And lastly, with fingers hooked around the band of her underwear, she slides off and steps out of them, the last piece of clothing now piled with the rest. 

Completely bare in front of him, in more than just the physical, Solana places both of her hands on his broad shoulders and answers in the softest voice, “yes.”

Roman briefly closes his eyes. His hands move back to her waist, gently tugging her closer to him. Solana’s eyes also shut just as he opens his and drinks all of her in. “aulelei oe…..” Oblivious to what he’s just said, Solana is instead tightening her grip on him when he moves his mouth to her neck, starting a downward trail of kisses down her body.

She’s missed this. So much. “Roman….”

She releases a sharp gasp when he covers his mouth over her areola, his other hand softly kneading her breast. Solana can already feel the wetness pooling between her legs as he sucks on her nipple, finally releasing with an audible pop as he tugs her onto his lap so that she’s straddling him.

Her eyes lock with him as he lifts his hand to her cheek. “How the hell could I ever be with somebody else when all I see is you?” It’s a rhetorical question posed with so much tenderness and dedication. It brings tears to her eyes.

Solana brings her hands back to his face, voice quiet and purposeful. “Make love to me.”

It doesn’t need to be asked or said twice. 

Roman is careful in how he lifts her and lays her down on the bed. Solana moves up the mattress, watching with a steady beating heart as Roman starts to remove his clothes. Movements somehow graceful but determined, like he’s just as eager and wanting this as much as she does. Because he is. Because Solana isn’t certain they’ve ever wanted each other more than they do in this moment. This space of full, visceral vulnerability. 

Completely naked, a small flash of nervousness fills her as Roman moves over her, the heavy, lengthy weight of him semi hard between his thick, muscular thighs. It’s been over a month since they were last intimate, and as much as she wants him, she knows there might be some initial pain.

Roman seems to catch onto her anxiety, hand going to her chin, capturing the softest kiss before he assures, “I’ll be gentle.”

Soft smile on her face, her hand moving to his chest, she reminds him, “you always are.”

Roman returns his mouth to hers, engaging her in a sensual kiss full of all the longing and love that fills the room, dances up the walls and creeps through the cracks and crevices. It’s overwhelming in all of the right and wonderful ways. 

But the more passionate their make out becomes, her nectar soaks her inner thighs, the throbbing between her legs so bothersome that she ends up breaking their kiss, both of them breathing heavily. Solana pulls him closer, her thigh lifting against his hip, another gasp leaving her mouth at the feel of him warm and hard against her apex.

“Please…..” She breathes, eyes shutting when Roman lays his forehead against hers. “Need you….” Solana finds her hand traveling down his chest, venturing until he’s hot, heavy, and pulsing in the palm of her hand. She watches him release a shaky breath at the contact of her hand on him, his shoulders tensing almost when she moves to align him at her aching, dripping entrance. 

Roman reaches and stops her, Solana confused only briefly when he instead takes over, directing her, “hold onto me.”

She nods and lifts her hand, instead doing just as he advised, her wrists locked over one another behind his neck. And the minute his thick mushroom head presses against her velvety lips, they’re both moaning, breathing uneven. But before he can ask her if she’s okay, if she wants him to stop, Solana wiggles her hips and scoots down the bed, wanting more of him. All of him. 

Roman takes note of this and tips her head upward, claiming her lips for another kiss, maintaining and holding it as he continues to slide into her welcomed warmth. Solana’s hands shift to his back, nails pressed against his tanned skin, tiny crescent indents formed from the sharpness of her nails.

“Fuck. I’ve missed this,” he breathes against her once fully situated and settled in her. The fullness of and tightness of which, something that takes them both a second to adjust to. “Missed this feeling. So tight….just for me…”

They’re both so deeply synched that Solana doesn’t even have to prompt him to move, Roman’s thrusts initially gentle to continue to help her re-adjust, to reacclimate to the feel of him, so deep, so good.

“Baby…..” She moans, holding onto him, thighs pressing against his hips as he pistons in and out of her, her back arching, head falling back against the pillow. “Roman.”

Roman groans, his thrusts purposeful and focused. “Does that feel good, baby?” 

Her answer should be obvious, but Solana nods as best she can, whining when he hits that spot, that sensitive space that always brings tears to her eyes. “Yes, baby.”

Head resting in the crook of her shoulder, Roman reaches for the headboard, using it to steady him as Solana continues to hold onto him, ankles locking above his ass. “Look what you do to me.” Her whimpers and moans under him only serve as fodder for his determination to make her feel good, to make her feel a fraction of how he feels being inside her like this. “I’ve never wanted or needed anyone like I need you, Solana.”

“Don’t need anything else in this life. Just you. Always you.” Her eyes shut, still holding onto him as she kisses his temple. “And you can’t leave me, Sol.” Solana’s stomach coils and twists when he switches angles, somehow reaching her even deeper than he already was. “You understand me?” He steals another kiss, whispering against her mouth. “I can’t lose you.”

There’s something deeper beyond his words, something underlying and still incredibly painful for him. And Solana knows exactly what it is. Tears from a different reason brimming her eyes, she palms his cheeks, forcing him to meet her contrite gaze. “I’m sorry.” His eyes shut, and her chest tightens. “I’m so sorry.”

He’s lost so much already. Had more loss as a child than some people will ever experience in their entire  lifetime. And almost losing her, because of her actions is clearly something that he’s still not over, that she didn’t realize affected him as deeply as it did. 

And she hates that. Hates that she missed how much he’s been struggling.

How much he’s been hurting. 

“Never again,” she promises. Never again can she put him through that, can she do that to him, can be the cause of so much emotional turmoil for him. “I promise, Ro.”

He pauses, stops mid movement, opens his eyes and looks at her, fully vulnerable and exposed. Letting her in in a way she knows no one else is privy to. This isn’t the Tribal Chief or the Capo. 

It’s just Roman.

Her Roman.

Solana takes a sharp breath as he pulls out of her almost entirely only to enter back in, slowly, gradually, a breathy “I love you” falling out of his mouth. Once again, he somehow manages to reach a different depth that has her back almost completely arched off the mattress, her breast pressing against his hard chest.

“Roman.” She’s not sure she could ever tire of having his name in her mouth, on her lips. It’s embedded in her soul at this point.

“I love you,” he repeats it, hips meeting hers, Solana whimpering from the overwhelming nature of it all. “I love you.” And again, each sensual thrust accompanied by a confession. A vow. A promise. An oath.

The pleasure continues, flows, consistent and strong, depleting her body of all energy while filling her with a rapture that feels too beautiful to be human. It carries and sustains her until she absolutely can’t take it anymore, Solana’s orgasm strong and pulsing, her toes curling and stomach coiling. Roman talks her through it, loving and comforting, his own coming over him not even minutes later. 

And the minute he falls down on the bed next to her, his arms are around her, tugging her close into his side. He kisses her temple, Solana holding onto his forearm, murmuring, “I love you.”

A part of her expects him to not say it back, to somehow be limited to only so many uses of a term that’s, sadly, unfamiliar to him. “I love you too.”

But, he does, and it may be the best thing anyone has ever said to her. She cranes her neck to look at him. “Enough to start talking to me more?” A small frown falls on her face. “I mean it, Roman, you—you can’t keep holding it all in.” She knows better than anyone else how badly that can turn out. “You always say you’ve got me, but–but I’ve got you too.”

Emotion flashes in his beautiful brown eyes. “I know.” Is his reply, quiet but understanding. “I’m—I’m going to work on it.”

“Good.” That’s all she can ask for. Because Roman has been so patient and understanding with her. The least she can do is return the favor.  “And I’ll start us off….” Taking a deep breath, Solana decides to share with him a secret she’s been keeping. “I’ve been having dr—”

Abrupt banging on the door startles Solana to the point that she nearly jumps out the bed. Her reaction makes Roman smile when she buries her head under the blankets.

“Roman, you fucking asshole! You parked that big ass truck in my spot!” Solana peeks from under the blanket, curious to see her husband’s reaction at being spoken to so boldly but also realizing she recognizes that voice. It’s the voice of the woman on the phone. This Ava person, most likely. His cousin. “Pe e te fa'agaoioi pe ou te sasaina i fafo faamalama uma!”

Roman, however, looks unbothered and borderline amused. “O ki o loo i luga o le matau ki. Aveese oe lava.”

Solana taps him on his chest, asking, “what did she sa—”

“Ava! Leave your cousin alone!” Fetu’s voice also calls out from outside the door, Solana’s eyes widening again. “He’s having make up sex with his wife!”

And just like that, it goes from bad to worse. Solana wants to melt into the bed, the floor, the ground. Anything to escape this humiliation. Looking over at Roman, she yell-whispers, “she heard us?”

Her husband, however, still looks just as unbothered and amused as before. “Baby, you’re not exactly very quiet.”

“Oh my god, Solana is here?” Ava gasps on the other side. “I’m so sorry! It’s nice to kind of meet you! Sorry you got stuck marrying my asshole cousin.”

“This is so embarrassing,” Solana moans, moving to bury her head into Roman’s chest before calling out with all awkwardness, “ummm, it’s n–nice to meet you too!”

“Tama teine, leave them alone! They might be making a baby!” And it just keeps going from bad to worse, Fetu adding on. “Keep the Samoan breeding kink tradition growing strong!”

“Uso o le tinā! What do you know about breeding kinks?” Solana is certain her face is tomato red. She’s never been so mortified. “Anyway, I’ll meet you later, Solana. And Roman, fuck you.”

He rolls his eyes, Solana waiting until she hears the footsteps vanish and melt into silence to speak again. “I can’t believe that happened.” Something said, however, triggers a thought for her. The breeding kink comment, specifically. “Roman….should we….should we use protection or something?” He looks confused, prompting her to explain. “I don’t—I don’t want you feeling pressured. I want a baby, but I want to make sure you’re good first too.” She adds on, wanting him to know how sincere she is. “Or, I can get on birth control. I know it’s not really allowed, but—”

“You’re my wife, Solana.” He cuts her off, hand to her cheek. “I’m not using a condom, and you’re not getting on birth control.” She nervously licks her lips as he brushes his thumb over her cheek. “When it happens….it happens. Okay?”

She nods, eyes closing when he kisses her forehead. She goes to lay on his chest, Roman’s hand on the small of her back, gradually moving downward. A small, teasing smile grows on her face as she looks up at him. “Dinner is gonna be ready soon, Ro….”

He hums, smirking when she gasps at how he squeezes her ass. “My appetite’s not for that….” Solana giggles when he flips them, so he’s over her, her hands gliding down his chest. “It’s makeup sex, right?” His eyes are filled with lust, Solana moaning when he starts spreading her legs. “So, let’s continue to make up.”

--------

Translations:

“Déjame en paz! ¡Te odio!” = "Leave me alone! I hate you!"

“Aulelei oe…..” = "You're so beautiful."

"Pe e te fa'agaoioi pe ou te sasaina i fafo faamalama uma!" = "Either you move it, or I'll smash out the windows!"

"O ki o loo i luga o le matau ki. Aveese oe lava." = "The keys are on the hook. Move it yourself."

"Tama teine." = "Niece."

"Uso o le tinā!" = "Aunt."

[strayrockette]

My Sunshine Girl: The Celebration

Next Chapter

Note: I’m finally giving in and writing this Benny fic my brain won’t stop rehashing. Enjoy 😊

Super Note: Listen, guys, gals, peeps...I really really really tried to keep this short but it ended up a lot longer than I intended. I even split it into two separate parts and it's STILL SOOO LONG IM SORRY! Also please excuse incorrect grammar. I tried to edit as much as I could but I'm sure I still missed something. My Masterlist

Summary: The birthday girl doesn’t want the night to end and a handsome stranger gives her an invitation.

Inspired by: (Today I Met) The Boy I’m Gonna Marry by Darlene Love, He’s Mine by the Platters, and @storiesfromafan.

---

Harold’s Diner was one of many to be open late at night. Where the others were dim and had few occupants, Harold’s Diner was packed with more than usual.

Half were regulars all grouped together on the far left. They held familiarity as they conversed and joked around. Laughter and chatter were loud and hard to escape in the mom-and-pop diner.

You fluttered from table to table, smiling wide, excitement and happiness oozing from your body. It had been a pleasant surprise to walk into your uncle's diner and find a couple of friends and family waiting for you.

Your best friend Nat had organized a small get-together for your birthday. Your Uncle Harold had allowed her to use his diner for the event, "it'll be good for business and it'll make her happy" He had shrugged his shoulders as if saying yes was the only answer. With his answer, Nat had taken it upon herself to decorate the diner in anticipation of the night.

While the diner was technically open to other customers, you didn't mind one bit. The small community you lived in was tight-knit and most customers were from nearby. Few and far between were out-of-towners who were just making a pitstop. But that didn't disturb you one bit.

Customers came and went as the night went on. Many wished you a happy birthday as you and your friends idled joyfully in the corner of the diner. You beamed with each happy birthday.

By the time your friends were ready to leave and retire for the night you pouted, the night was only beginning and you were too excited to see what the cool air and starry sky had to offer.

You’d tried to convince Nat to stay out later but her boyfriend wouldn’t budge. She grasped your shoulders softly, “We can hang out some other time hun, Mikey doesn’t like it when I stay out late”

You’d rolled your eyes and mumbled a passive goodnight. Waving her off with a small and placid smile. Uncle Harold had practically shooed you out of the diner so he could clean in peace. He’d ushered out a goodnight and a see you at home, before closing the diner doors to prevent another customer from coming in.

All too suddenly you were left alone staring up at the sky and wondering exactly what you would do next. Your feet ached in the black wedges Nat had bought you. And you really wished you could sit down somewhere.

You walked along the sidewalk, taking in the dimly lit path, you wondered if you should have taken Nat's offer to drop you off at home. But you didn't like Mikey, so you politely declined.

You continued to wander, your feet aching as you tried to think of where else you could go. Who else could you visit before retiring to your cold empty bed. Lost in thought you barely noticed soft hands moving to grasp your wrists “Y/N?”

You blinked, your eyes focusing on the person in front of you. Short hair and wide eyes, “Kathy?”

A smile broke out, “Oh my gosh! How are you?”

Kathy’s brown eyes twinkled, “Been better. Since when were you back?”

“About a month ago” you responded happily. “I didn’t think I’d run into you”

She fixed her purse over her shoulder, “Talk about perfect timing. Do you remember Alice? Well, she asked me to come to spot her at this bar, but I don’t want to go in alone.”

Her question was unsaid but you were too excited to keep the night going to even think about saying no. You hooked an arm around hers and practically dragged her into the bar. You weren’t prepared for what kind of club you were walking into. But if you learned anything from living in New York City for the last 4 years, it was always best to walk as if you belonged and barrel through bodies who got in your way.

You did just that, Kathy squeezing herself closer to you, your skirt rode up with each stride, the lime green plaid skirt catching more than a few eyes. But you were always prepared for a night of fun, dolling yourself up in the cutest skirts or dresses.

Your legs were covered in nude stockings a pair of dark shorts over ‘em, like hell I’d make it easier for scummy eyes and hands to slip into my “honey pot” the thought almost made you sneer outwardly but you attempted to keep the joyful smile on your face.

You pushed through, shouldering men bigger than you, slapping hands that tried to grab your waist and smiling sweetly when they insisted, “Not for you sweetheart”

Your confidence and boldness had men parting a path for you as you tugged Kathy behind you. Your eyes searching for a familiar blonde, green eyed girl you used to tease for the gap in her teeth.

Alice’s head popped up over the crowd, her hands waving enthusiastically in the air as she caught sight of your dark brown hair and smiling face, “Y/N??OH MY GOD YOU’RE BACK”

She screeched over the loud music and voices, completely comfortable in the bar filled with greasy old and young men alike.

You rushed through the last stretch of the crowd, breaking through to rush around her table, gathering Alice into a hug you giggled and swayed together, “I missed you, you chatterbox”

You teased her as you pulled away. Your eyes roamed her face. “Well, someone’s changed”

Her green eyes looked you over a smirk on her lips, “I could say the same for you, little miss, barreling through those men like you own the place,” she leaned forward whispering in your ear, “Good job”

You laughed, patting her shoulder you pulled a seat out and sat down. Kathy was already seated, her fingers digging into the purse she clutched to her chest. Pulling money from the bottom of her purse she slid it over to Alice, “Here take it”

Alice grinned, “Awe, thanks hun, you’re the best”

Kathy looked around her gaze warily taking in the rowdy men, their greasy appearance, and tattooed bodies, “Uh huh, I gotta go”

Alice frowned, “Awe come on, you just got here and Y/N here, the fun’s just got started”

Kathy shook her head, her discomfort growing, “No way, we can get together another day”

She stressed over the word day. You bumped her shoulder, “Oh come on Pumpkin, I could use a dance with you”

She turned her head to you, her discomfort and excitement warring with each other, “No can do sweets, I hate it here”

Alice snorted, “You hate anywhere that isn’t your home, anyways” She motions to the other end of the table, “over here is cockroach”

You followed, Alice’s gesture, noticing his rough appearance-much like many of the men here, but his eyes were gentle and warm, he’s a harmless bug you thought.

You gave him a nod of acknowledgment and a hello around the same time Kathy paused her jittery movements to say “What?”

She gave him a confused and disbelieving look. He nodded, seemingly used to the confused and odd looks, “They call me cockroach,“ he repeated.

Kathy scoffed her eyes once again looking around cautiously, “And why they call you a stupid name like that?” She asked.

You leaned forward, your elbows resting on the table, “Is it cuz cockroaches are indestructible?”

You were curious about his name and what meaning it had to him. Based on the group of men he hung with you assumed there would be plenty of weird names to learn. He grinned at you, “cuz I like to eat bugs, you know, like a gag but also cuz I just like to eat em”

You laughed amused by his statement. Kathy looked disgusted and she voiced as much, “That’s disgusting. Look, I gotta go, you comin’ with me?”

She turned to you at the end of her sentence. Her eyes pleading with you to leave the bar with her. You pouted, “Sorry, pumpkin, I think I’m gonna stick around a lil longer”

Alice sighed, “Ay, they’re not that bad,” she reached across the table, patted Kathy's hand, and smiled reassuringly, “Just sit here for a bit, okay?”

Kathy huffed as Alice slipped from her seat to go to the bar, her eyes glancing around nervously. You leaned in, whispering in her ear, “It’s best to pretend you belong than to act like you don’t, pumpkin.”

She turned once more her jitteriness increasing the longer she stayed, “And why in the hell would I do that?”

You sighed and shook your head, “to lessen the stares you’re gettin, duh”

She rolled her eyes, “they’d stare no matter what.” She concluded irately.

Alice slips back into her seat, handing you and Kathy a pop to drink.

Before you could respond to reassure Kathy, two men walked up to your table, one is shorter than the other, neither are bad looking but the grease on their skin and the scent of cigarette smoke hanging around them makes them undesirable to most women. At least, the women living the prim and proper lifestyle.

Kathy avoids making eye contact but you do it freely, unbothered and curious at what they’ve got to say.

The shorter one of the two leans forward his dark eyes roaming from Kathy to you, “Hey there.” His voice is raspy and not too deep nor high. It’s rather pleasant, you think passively. “Either of you wanna come live with me?”

It’s almost a tease and a genuine question, the other jumps in eagerly, he’s tall and bare-chested, and he’s wearing a jean vest that all the men in this bar are wearing, “What about me? Wanna go out with me” his eyes look to you, they’re a soft brown and you can tell he’s a sweetheart deep down. But with all the men gathered at this bar, kindness, and sweetness are buried beneath their manly-esque appearance.

Kathy utters, “No, thank you” with a shake of her head and her eyes downcast. But you stare up at them and simply say, “No”

You’re leaning back in your chair, hands calmly placed over your thigh, your legs crossed. You have no worries or cares and you’re not at all intimidated by these men. Kathy goes on to make excuses for why she said no. She looks around the table “Oh, I have a date”

The tall one hums, “A date huh?” He nods his head at you, “What about you?”

You tease them, "If I did have a date, it isn't either of you."

The tall one laughs hollering over his shoulder, "We've got a sassy one over here."

The short on places a hand on his heart, "I'm hurt sunshine"

You laugh enjoying the light banter and tease.

Kathy nudges you, her eyes wide and warning. You stick your tongue out a silent message for her to loosen up.

She pinches your side and then says unconvincingly, “Well, I’ve got a date. 12 o’clock," She nods to herself, " I-I have to get home. She's coming with me.”

Kathy insists on whisking you away from here, she's seen the looks these men give you and bless your heart. Kathy isn't sure if you're unaware or unbothered, she refuses to leave you behind. You were the one good girlfriend she had ever had, even if you had disappeared for 4 years.

The shorter one lifts his cigarette to his mouth and inhales, “You hear that cockroach”

He points his cigarette in Kathy’s direction, “Cinderella’s got a date" He points to you, "And Sunshine waitin' for her man”

Kathy sinks into her seat and you wonder if she would bolt for the door. But with the two men blocking their path, she remains rooted in her seat.

The tall one echos, “Yeah, Cinderelli’s got a date, and Sunshine’s waitin' for her man to find her”

Cockroach chuckles and shakes his head. The two men slip away from the table, the shorter one going on to say, “Cinderella’s gonna turn into a pumpkin or somethin’”

Another man hollers, "Wonder who the lucky man is, Sunshine"

You giggle to yourself, the men reminded you of another group you'd known in New York. It wasn't too bad once you found your bearings amongst them.

You glanced at Kathy, seeing her eying someone with suspicious eyes.

You followed her gaze, seeing an older man calmly sitting with his back to the wall and his legs propped up on a chair. He was eyeing you gals with soft eyes, he gave you two a nod as another man leaned down to whisper in his ear.

Your eyes lingered for a few moments trying to grasp what exactly was being said, with no luck you looked over to the group of men, two of them being the ones who had attempted to pick you and Kathy up, stood near the Jukebox. They lazed around, heads bent speaking to each other, one of them glanced up to look over at the table you sat in.

Kathy shook her head, her voice wavering, “Look at them whisperin and plannin’ somethin, oh I gotta go”

Kathy had reached for your hand, already pulling you up from the seat. Your feet nearly stumbling as you righted yourself to walk behind her. You tugged lightly, turning her around, “If you’re gonna drag me around like ole times, Pumpkin, give me a sec to get my bearings.”

She sighed and nodded. Her right hand clutching her purse tighter as she stood and waited.

You fixed your skirt and bent down to grab your purse that hung loosely over your chair, swinging it over your shoulder, you stood and got ready to leave.

You gave the bar one last sweep with your eyes, stopping when you saw him. Blonde windswept hair and baby blue eyes. Toned arms littered with tattoos, and grease sticking to his skin, you assumed it was motor oil and some other form of grease from tinkering away at bikes.

Your head tilted and a growing feeling of intrigue and curiosity overwhelmed you. Forgetting about Kathy, you plopped onto the chair and clumsily tapped Alice’s arm to get her attention. Your bag knocked against the table nearly falling off your shoulder and hitting the ground but you tucked it on your lap and leaned closer to Alice, “Hey Alice, who is that looker over by the pool table”

Alice looked to where your eyes hovered, catching on to whom you were asking about, “No, girl just no”

You turned, giving her a frown, “What?”

“Thats Benny, you don’t want to go there” She insisted.

Kathy slid into the seat next to you, her shoulder brushing yours, “Don’t tell me you’re eyeing one of these greasy fuckers”

You jabbed her with your elbow, “Be nice,”

Passing her a pleading look. Kathy sighed and leaned onto the table, her escape plan on hold.

You pleaded with Alice to tell you more, “Come on, spill! You never hold back, what’s the deal?”

Alice gave you an unimpressed look and shook her head.

"Just fill my curiosity meter, sweets," You shook her arm as if it would help make her spill.

Alice snorted, “You’re never just curious, Sunny”

Kathy hummed, “Agreed. You rarely give anyone the time of day, why are you askin' about this one”

That's a story that would be too long to spill, you sigh, "I'll tell yah later"

“Look, no one wants to date Benny, he’s trouble. Every time he gets on his bike he gets into an accident” she looked around conspiratorially, “and he’s got a temper on him, he won’t hurt no lady but put a man in front of him and he’ll swing any which way he pleases”

She tried to stress his flaws but you couldn’t quite let go of the curiosity in you. You didn’t have his name before, you’d wondered where he slipped off to after your uncle's diner. He’d shown up out of the blue in the early afternoon. His hair freshly ruffled from the wind, a cigarette hanging from his lips, his long fingers fixing his jacket, and his long jean-clad legs striving through the diner doors with grace and confidence. For a rebel against society's norms, he was handsome. Too handsome. You couldn’t believe he didn’t have a line of girls wanting to get with him.

But then again, most of them probably steered clear to avoid angering their families. Lucky for you, you had no such concerns.

You remembered how your uncle was about to throw him out of your diner, refusing to serve “vandal scum” in his family friendly diner. But you had swooped in, bouncing over before any hands could fly and faces bruised. You’d smiled blithely, gently reminding your uncle it was your birthday and you had no need or want for a fight to break out and break the mood that had settled into the diner’s atmosphere.

People were coming in and out, most were family and friends visiting to say hi and spend time with you for your birthday. Some were customers but even they stopped for a few to talk to you. Reminiscing over younger you who had greeted each of them one time or another at the diner.

You’d turned to the handsome stranger, your hair swirling around you in waves, a playful finger wagging in his direction, “This is a family friendly diner, handsome, I’m afraid you can’t smoke in here”

You had expected him to argue but he merely put out his cigarette, handing it to your outstretched palm. You discarded it in the trash behind the hostess stand and grabbed a menu for him. You glanced to your uncle and then to the stranger, “You can eat here as long as you behave. and you will, right?” You asked sweetly.

The handsome stranger merely nodded, giving you a half smile. His blue eyes staring intently into your own dark brown that glittered with a hint of gold and red in the setting sun that glowed through the windows.

You had waved your hands in the air, “See didi, there’s no trouble here. Just a handsome man wanting to eat your delicious food”

You had defused the situation so quickly it nearly gave everyone a whiplash but that was something everyone had missed. Your ability to lighten an atmosphere.

After getting the stranger seated you went back to your previous activities nearly forgetting the blue eyes that lingered on you throughout his stay.

You had almost forgotten, until now.

Alice shook her head, grasping your hand, “Don’t say I didn’t warn yah”

She glanced at Kathy, “If you wanna leave that bad, let’s get you to a phone to call for a ride mkay”

Kathy sighed in relief, “thank you, you’re the best”

They left you to your thoughts. You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth, thinking over what Alice said and remembering the brief meeting from earlier in the day. You contemplated going up to him, just to ask if had enjoyed the food. He had wiped his plate clean so you know he did. But perhaps you could also ask him why your uncle couldn’t stand the sight of him. Maybe that’s too personal you thought idly.

You would have sunk deeper and deeper into your thoughts if it weren’t for a figure slipping into a chair next to you. His arms hugging the back of the chair, his body leaning over to stare at you.

You almost choked on air realizing who was seated next to you. His eyes peered into yours, soft and gentle. His beard was a golden blonde like his hair, it framed his face nicely, his cheekbones and jaw were sculpted to perfection and you wondered if you ever laid eyes on someone who was casually perfect. “Hey”

Your eyes traced his face, “Hello handsome, I didn't think I'd see yah again"

He nodded giving you a half smile, so similar to the one you had received when you had helped him get a table at your uncles diner, “I’m Benny”

You noticed his voice was a deep honeyed rasp. Somehow smooth and bumpy. You wanted to listen to him talk all night, but based on your previous and current encounters; you didn’t think he’d do much talking.

You tilted your head to the side humming in reply, “I’m Y/N”

Silence fell, a bubbly giddy feeling in your chest almost had you giggling nervously. You’d never had a man stare at you so intensely without a crude or rude comment hanging from their lips. But Benny simply watched. His eyes trailing over your face, mapping out the curve of your nose and lips, the laugh lines in your face, the dimples resting at the top of your cheeks and the way your honey brown eyes watched him in return.

He wanted to reach out to touch your cheek wondering if they felt as warm as the redness in them implied.

You swallowed the giggle by biting your bottom lip, you seemed to be doing that a lot tonight. You hoped you wouldn’t bruise it with how much you had repeated this action. “You gonna stare at me all night, Benny”

You whispered his name and it felt scandalous. As if it was the most intimate pet name you had ever come up with prior to knowing his true name.

He smiled, rubbing a hand over his chin then through his hair, he adjusted his position, “Yeah, I guess”

He made no other comment. Not once bothering to fill the growing silence between you. Perhaps there wasn’t much to be said because his eyes said it all. He was interested, you gathered.

His eyes inviting, patiently waiting on you to confirm…something. You weren’t sure.

And as much as you wanted to do or say anything you simply went with, “I-Uh-I’m with my girls”

You stuttered, what a terrible flirt. You wanted to slam your head into the table, to sink into the floor and disappear. That wasn’t what you wanted to say but it was the only thing you could think of.

“Oh” he looked down at his arms then slowly looked back up to you, “okay”

His eyes were softer and a little sad. More silence. Your heart was beating so fast with adrenaline. You swore you would never forgive yourself for being an idiot. You hoped he would say something, ask you anything. Maybe give you something other than his contemplative silence. But no, he only lifted his hands up, “You’re with your girls”

He had shrugged as he said it, gracefully getting up to leave you alone. You could feel his eyes leaving you and he left you to a different kind of silence. You couldn’t believe how idiotic you had been. As if the invitation wasn’t clear enough you had shut him down. Leave it to you to blow off the only man who had ever made you feel anything other than disgust under their gaze.

Kathy slid into the chair to your right, her mouth parting ready to ask you if you would be leaving with her, but another figure slipped into a seat at the other side of the table.

You recognized him from earlier, the man who watched you and Kathy from his corner of the bar. He gave you girls a quirk of his lip and a nod, “What are your names, girls”

Kathy leaned back and sighed, “What is this? A rotary buffet?”

You could tell she was getting tired of all the men who were coming up to you gals. “I’m Kathy, this is Y/N”

The man nodded once more, “I’m uh Johnny, I’m the president of this club.”

You hummed, “Nice to meet yah”

Kathy rolled her eyes but gave him a nod of acknowledgement. He continued to speak, “Just want the two of yous to know that..you don’t have to worry”

Your brow raised surprised by his statement but knowing where he was going.

“Worry about what?” Kathy questioned with rising suspicion.

Johnny shook his head, “Nothin, that’s all. The guys just wanna have some fun…”

He nodded his eyes trailing to the group of men by the Jukebox, “I won’t let nothin happen to yah”

His grey eyes scanned the two of you.

Kathy quirked a challenging eye brow, “Oh yeah? And what’s gonna happen to us?”

You placed a hand on her arm, trying to calm her growing agitation, “Nothin” Johnny responded.

This didn’t appease Kathy at all, she rolled her eyes and sarcastically laughed, “haha, thanks for that, we gots to go now. Nice to meet yah. Adios. Bye”

You gripped your bag over your shoulder allowing her to drag you out of the bar. When you noticed the men leering and getting closer to her, you tugged her back and took the lead, shoving them aside with strength that once again surprised them. You got out relatively untouched. But you knew that there would be some grease stains on your skirt and stockings. Kathy didn’t seem too happy about the prints on her ass though.

You would have laughed if it weren’t for the enraged look on her face. “What animals”

She hissed. Trying to swipe away the grease but the damage was done.

“Alright, sunny, I called a cab and it should be here any minute. You gonna hop in?”

You sighed and hummed, after blowing off the Benny guy you wanted nothin but to go home and wallow in your failure.

Her lips smirked, “Gonna wallow in self pity for rejectin’ that biker guy?”

Her comment released a wave of groans from your lips, “My gosh Kathy! I blew it!”

You hooked your right arm though her left and followed her across the street, “I was THIS close” you lifted your thumb and pointer finger and squeezed them together, “to maybe going on a date or somethin’”

She laughed, “Oh honey, you’ve never even bothered to flirt nor talk to a man that wasn’t family or close friends. Of course you’d blow it”

Her tease left you pouting, throwing your head back you groaned and stomped your feet playfully, “If I had a second chance I think I could get it right”

Your eyes traced the Big Dipper, wishing for another chance. But for what? You didn’t even think you had it in you. Sure you could be confident and happy. Bulldozing your way through life. Making others smile and laugh. Getting others to feel comfortable and welcoming.

But flirting? Dating? Talking to an insanely handsome man?

An impossible task you really wanted to try.

A few minutes went by before Kathy started to nudge your side. You turned your head to stare at her, one brow raised in question. Her eyes flitted across the street and you followed.

He was walking across the street, cigarette on his lips and a lighter hovering in front of him as he lit it. His hand shoved the lighter back into his pocket and he nonchalantly walked up to his sleek black bike. Swinging his long legs over the bike, he jumped to start it, his bike roaring to life.

He sat down, fixed his jacket, and gave you a look over his shoulder. His eyes were obscured by shadows but with the slight incline of his head, you figured he was silently telling you to get on.

Kathy pushed you towards him, your feet stumbling over the pavement. You righted yourself and shot her a glare. She wiggled her fingers at you, shooing you in response.

You slowly took a step forward. Then two. Then three. And before you could turn around and run away you were standing next to him.

He plucked his cigarette from his lips and gave you a look. His eyes scanned you from head to toe. Amused to see you standing near him. Your fingers fidgeted with the hem of your skirt.

You were just about to ask him if you could get on. But rowdy men spilled out of the bar. Hooting loudly at seeing you next to Benny. Urging you to get on. Some commenting about your pretty skirt riding up your thigh. And some praising Benny for reining you in.

“Get on girl, it’s gonna be a fun ride” one of them laughed out.

Benny gave no indication he was listening to them. And he gave no indication of what he wanted you to do. You suppose he had already given you a hint earlier. You sighed and got on.

Once seated you tried to tug your skirt down the best you could. Silently thankful that you had prepared for the worst-case scenario. Your black shorts peeked from beneath your skirt. Your thighs resting comfortably over the bike.

More of the men hollered, “We’ve got a smart one”

“Ay suppose only Benny can take a peek underneath her skirt”

You blushed at the comment. You would like to deny it but saying anything would only fuel their provocative statements.

You turned to take a quick peek at Kathy, finding her getting on one of the men’s bikes. Having been herded by the others to take a ride. She had obviously given in to get them to leave her alone. She shot you a look. Her eyes flickered between you and Benny. She gave you a wry smile. She was excited for you. But not that pleased with her own situation. However, she’d pull through if you were experiencing it with her.

Your hands were loosely gripping onto Benny’s side, unsure of where to place them.

One of Benny’s hands reached around, grabbing yours to tightly wrap it around his midsection. You laced your fingers together and held on tightly. Trying to ignore the way your body pressed into his.

Someone shouted for him to take off and let him know that they would meet up with him on the expressway. With a jolt of the bike, you lurched forward. Your thighs squeezing Benny's legs and your grip getting tighter.

After that, you were a goner. The night sped past you in a blaze of light. The stars glittering and the town lights fading into the darkness. The wind swept your hair, tossing your neatly primed waves into a knotted mess.

You squealed, pressing your face into his back. Your eyes followed the passing scenery falling in love with the speed and the freedom that swelled up inside you.

You felt him chuckle at your reaction, you tore your gaze away and leaned at an angle to see the side of his face, you could tell he was smiling.

You were in trouble. All the warnings Alice had given you had been discarded. Your heart was a fool and your mind had been made. And you wondered where exactly this night would lead.

A/N: If you made it this far down, I applaud you 👏part 2 is already written and is currently being edited. If you want quick updates, comment for a tag! Thank you so much for sticking around to read this long fic!

[malleusfucker]

private study session

i have a shit ton of uni work but is writing smut of this man more important i think so

i live and breathe for asshole malleus y’all don’t even understand that man is a smug bastard

synopsis: your grades have been plummeting. bad. so much so that if you don’t improve, you might have to end up retaking the yearーwhich you definitely don’t want. no matter how hard you study and revise by yourself, nothing seems to stick. that was until you built up the courage to ask your close friend, malleus, if he could tutor you.

warnings: smut/nsfw, degrading, choking, lowkey hate sex, overstimulation, unprotected sex, mating press, reader is afab but no gender or pronouns are explicitly specified

word count: 2.8k

“oh-ho? and what makes you believe that my time will not be wasted?"

“it won’t, i swear! …please, malleus, just this once. i might have to retake the year if i don’t improve.” you shifted your feet nervously, continuing your embarrassing attempt at trying to convince the dragon fae to lend you just a slither of his intelligence. you weren’t one to beg, but at this pointーyou had to. of course, being the only non-magic student to have miraculously enrolled into NRC, it was a given your grades would be subparーbut not to this extent.

"and we certainly don't want that, do we?"

malleus's tone was condescending, apparently relishing the sight of you pleading for his help in front of him. his lips curved into a grin, and he cocked his head to one side. “i mean… that would be unfortunate if you needed to repeat the year. i do enjoy the lessons i have with you, child of man.”

your eyes widened as if he were finally giving in to your wish, like a puppy seeing a treat for the first time. “then? then…!? will you help me, malleus?”

malleus seemed thoughtfully contemplative for a few seconds. you were sure you saw a glimpse of something in his eyes for a single second. something menacing.

“fine. i’ll accept your request, child of man. you’re quite the lucky one, you know? not everyone can say that they’ve had me as their personal tutor.”

personal tutor, huh? it didn’t sound bad when he put it like that.

it was 6 p.m. malleus agreed to assist you back at your own dormーwhich surprised you slightly, but you didn’t mind. if anything, it only meant that evening was about to be spent without any disturbances.

…

it became clear that malleus was going to spend hours tutoring you like he stated he would. you sat pitifully looking at the pages in front of you as he poured information into your ears that amounted to little more than background noise. he was in the seat next to you. his body, though, was stiff. with one leg over the other and his arms crossed, it felt like being lectured about how dumb you are. 

maybe this wasn’t a good idea.

but it was probably too late to back out of it now.

snap

“are you ignoring me, child of man?”

as you heard his fingers snap at you, you quickly brought your eyes back into focus to see a face brimming with frustration and irritation.

“were you even paying attention to a single word i said?”

malleus was furious. with a tone laced with something much more than frustration, you knew you messed up big. the words that came out of his mouth only made the hairs on your arms prick up, feeling your mouth get dry as he leaned in close to your face, seeing the rage in his expression ever more clearly.

he was close. too close. you were so uneasy that you were certain he would smite you on the spot if you said something stupid.

“yes..! i swear i was malleus!”

you felt his stare burn right through you, feeling as though he’d bite off your head any second. all that you could hope was that if you said “yes” enough, maybe he’d let you off easier.

that wasn’t the case.

“am i boring you? is a human’s time for daydreaming more important than mine?”

you started to shake in your seat, your heart in your throat.

“you have a lot of nerve, child of man. taking my generosity for granted, really, you are bold.”

he drew even nearer until his face was almost brushing yours. all you could do was tremble and pray that he wouldn't actually murder you at this very moment. suddenly feeling paralysed, you couldn't even gather the energy to defend yourself.

he pressed a finger on your foreheadーhardーwatching you practically unravel in front of him.

“what will it take, child of manーfor you to listen? how can we make the time left today not utterly pointless?”

he remained far too close to your face for your liking. whilst your body was about to give way any second, you couldn’t help but feel your face heat up for some strange reason. you’ve never seen malleus so close up before, it was almost an honour. you wanted to shake these stupid, borderline dangerous thoughts away, but you almost felt in awe at the anger he was expressing to youーas bad as that was.

“hoh? got nothing to say? heh, it’s almost as if you’re trying to anger me. you’re certainly the first to do such a thing, child of man.”

he moved his finger from off your forehead to your jaw, resting it under your chin as he slowly tilted your head up to look at him. you gave him a glazed-over look. it was as if every single thought in your head suddenly turned off, rendering you speechless and still. feeling his finger touch underneath your chin, you couldn’t help but sweat, your face becoming more flushed by the second.

“hmm, your face is heating up. am i embarrassing you, child of man?”

malleus was. 

but even with all that embarrassment that was thoroughly washing through your entire body, you could sense a faint sensation of excitement starting to bubble. were you the masochistic type? did you actually enjoy getting humiliated by him? perhaps not, but seeing him get so riled up over youーhis face inches away from your ownーhey, maybe dying at the hands of someone like him wouldn’t be…too bad.

though, in the end, you could never hide things from malleus. if he couldn't detect your excitement from your face, something else revealed it for you. the slits in his eyes thinned, he glared at you. he could smell, ever so slightly, a hint of your arousal.

“...my. do you have a death wish?”

as soon as those words left his lipsーyou blinkedーsuddenly finding yourself having been thrown onto your desk, your back slamming onto the hardwood.

you gasped as you abruptly came out of your trance and felt him securely hold your legs as he towered over you. malleus wasted no time in entertaining those lewd thoughts your body was so clearly showingーwith a simple snap of his fingers, your clothes vanished and fell beside you. to say you were shocked to see this sudden change in him would be an understatement. you couldn’t tell what he was thinking, with how fast everything was moving, you could say he was eager butーwith that expression…

it looked as if your mere presence disgusted him.

malleus slid his hand up over your neck, wrapping his long fingers around it before slowly squeezing as he spoke.

“heh. child of man, give me one good reason why i shouldn’t kill you right here.”

your body was shaken to its core. that voiceーthat sentence alone made you feel faint. you pathetically flailed your arms around, weakly trying to release the grip he was slowly tightening on your neck. the pressure around your throat distracted you from how vulnerable you looked under him right now. naked and shiveringーmalleus started to grin and leaned close to you, gently planting a kiss on your forehead. it was strange. the kiss felt so soft on you, yet the pain you felt merely inches away couldn’t have been more different.

he laid tiny wet kisses down your forehead and jaw before snatching his other hand and slipping it between your legs, gently teasing your wet folds. something about the contrast between his touch and his kisses made you melt; you felt yourself slump lower and lower onto the desk as you embarrassedly leaked all over it. “...malleus- i’m- i’m sorry-” you wheeze, still trying to release the vicious hold he had on your neck.

his face stayed close to you, and he suddenly licked a long stripe up your neck and jaw. the sudden sensation made you twitch, moaning slightly at how warm and wet his forked tongue felt against your bare flesh.

“it’s all too late to apologise now.”

“tutoring you was an utter waste of time. now, i’d much rather try something else.”

before you could even attempt to reply, he let his hand from your neck free. you gaspedーsuddenly feeling your naked, trembling body be dragged to the edge of the desk. your mind was racing so much that you failed to hear the sound of his belt suddenly slamming against the ground. you stared off at the ceiling, your lip quivering. the whole thing seemed like a dream, albeit a strange one. your rational mind refused to accept the reality of the situationーbut your body...had never felt so hot before. it felt unbearable; you needed to be relieved. and luckily, malleus was there, leaning over with his gaze searing through you evermore.

he forcefully propped your shaking legs up against his waist with one hand, immediately snatching your face to make you look at him. however, for a moment, it looked as if he had forgotten what had led you two to be in such a predicament and simply loomed over you, staring at you. his gaze almost switched to a softer one, feeling the urge to gently caress your cheek. though that was quickly discarded, and immediately that familiar look of disgust soon reappeared on his face.

malleus moved his hips closer to yoursーfinally feeling his hard erection brush against your twitching core; you wincedーwishing you could throw your arms around him and bring him even closer to you.

malleus, however, was not in the mood to be so courteous to you and certainly didn't want to take up any more time than had already been lost.

without any preparation, you suddenly felt malleus drive one of his cocks into you. you screamed out, feeling him sliding and bottoming out of you with just one thrust. swiftly, with three of his fingers then violently thrust into your mouth, you gagged and choked, tears beginning to spill down your cheeks, 

“bite down. good students know not to be noisy.”

you tried to pathetically choke out to malleus that it was too muchーyour body shook and convulsed from the agonising splitting pain of his long, hard cock bullying its way into you, poking and prodding at your cervix. you sank your nails into the desk, biting down hard on his fingers as he pushed and slammed his hips into you, your cries for help becoming louder by the second. within minutes of him thrusting into you, you felt pressure rapidly build in your stomach, causing you to clench and squeeze against him. 

“oh? what’s this? don’t tell me you’re going to cum already?”

you wailed, but his insulting remarks just made you feel worse about your own increasing arousal. still choking on his fingers, you nodded frantically when you then felt sharp cramping throughout your body as if you were about to cum. he swiftly slipped his fingers out while he was still thrusting into you just so he could hear your pitiful cries. 

you felt your body shudder against the desk as a wave of scorching hot pleasure swept over you, pouring and seeping down onto the hardwood under you. you tried to catch your breath, gagging and choking as you already felt so sore and painful from just one orgasm. but it was obvious that malleus wasn't through with you just yet. it was, if anything, just the start.

he gave you time to calm down, your breath slowly easing as you shut your eyes, thinking this torture had reached its end. 

of course, malleus would not let you off that lightly. his rage persisted and seeing you believe that this punishment was over just made him more spiteful.

he leaned in, his breath hot, “i’m so glad you’re enjoying yourself. now put your arms around me.” his tone was once again mocking, but this time it felt more serious, like everything you did would simply enrage him more.

he suddenly forced you into a mating press, your legs wedged up against your chest as you struggled to wrap your trembling arms around his head. you cried out and started to think that your body wouldn’t be able to handle thisーthat he might actually break you.

as he started to softly drive into you, drawing more weak and muffled groans from your lips, your hands connected to the base of his horns, clutching and scraping your nails across them. he started off slow, almost giving a relaxing quality to his thrusts as he softly kissed your forehead and smiled sweetly against your face, much to your surprise. your body relaxed as a result of his sudden shift in attitude, enjoying the fleeting moments of him lovingly moving his hips against yours, which were only going to abruptly come to an end.

your eyes were closed, not being able to see the horrific smile malleus suddenly had across his face. you assumed that the strange sadistic side of him had long since vanished, as evident by your voice becoming moans of pure pleasure rather than of pain. regardless of his disposition, he enjoyed seeing you this way. seeing how you moaned so quietly and softly only made the urge to completely ruin you that much stronger.

“are you enjoying this?”

you slowly opened your eyes, malleus still gently pushing into you as you lazily nodded, whimpering as the pleasure inside you continued to become greater. “mmm…malleus. it feels so good…don’t stop.” 

“heh. so you think you can tell me what to do? your disrespect truly knows no bounds.”

your growing sense of pleasure abruptly gave way to a dreadful fear as he pushed your legs higher onto your chest and over his shoulders, making it clear that he was absolutely certain you couldn't get away. not understanding what he meant, your lip began to quiver, only for him to rid you of your confusion by suddenly thrusting into you aggressively. you screamed out, tears soon welling in your eyes again as he gave you no time to acclimate to the sudden pace. he licked his lips, savouring the view of you struggling and wailing underneath him as he gradually began to envelop your neck with his fingers. he hovered his face close to yours, sticking his long, forked tongue out before sloppily kissing your lips, still continuing his ruthless pace. you groaned under him, feeling yourself beginning to choke from both his tongue and his fingers, which were slowly beginning to squeeze your throat once again.

it was all far too muchーyour vision starting to blur, and all of your senses drowning and bleeding into one another as he kept pounding his thick cock into you, causing you to harshly grip and pull his hair. 

he immediately drew his face back and tutted at you, but seeing the way your eyes began to roll into the back of your head only made him want to quicken his paceーif it was even possible. 

“haha…perfect. so perfect…”

the words coming out of his mouth didn’t make sense. he was praising you yet abusing you with every thrust and squeeze of your body, not even giving you a chance to cry out as your head slowly began to feel faint. all of the pain and pleasure made you lose your mind, feeling your orgasm approaching rapidly as he started to lick and nip at your ears. 

he throbbed and twitched inside of you and felt his own climax begin to rise, eventually making the decision to be generous enough and remove his vice-like grasp from around your neck. you gasped and cried out, finally able to breathe and mewling as a result of his cruel touch. 

“malleus...ーpleaseーit’s too…ーmuch... ’m gonna-” he smiled at your pleas, pressing your legs harder against your chest, allowing him to thrust even deeper into you.

“heh, are you going to cum? haha…then do it. cum for me.”

it seemed as if he had put you under a spell with how immediate and intense your orgasm was, your walls clenching down on his throbbing cock with tears dripping down your chin. you felt the sensation of hot, burning pleasure wrack through your body once again, not even hearing your own screams from how strong it was.

malleus didn't even allow you to come down from your high. instead, he kept pushing to reach his own climax, feeling his body start to shudder and throb as he kissed you. “i’m…close…you’ll allow me to cum inside of you, won’t you? i know you will.” 

you didn’t even care anymoreーyour legs continued to shake and tremble as you feebly nodded with your eyelids flickering. it seemed like malleus would fulfil his word, for a few seconds later, he let out a moan as he unleashed and pumped copious loads of white cum into you, causing you to whimper as you felt him completely fill you up.

his breathing evened almost immediately. wiping the sweat from off your face, he delicately slid his cock out from inside of you to admire his work, gazing at the way your body jerked with his cum spilling and gushing out of your abused hole.

…

“heh. maybe tutoring you every week won’t be so bad after all.”

[winchesterwild78]

Hunters and Secrets pt 2

Master List

Characters: Dean Winchester x Reader (dating), Sam Winchester x Reader (friends), Eileen

Warnings: angst, fluff, SMUT

A/N: Had to get out of my head today, so I wrote the 2nd part. The 3rd part is coming soon too. Things are just so crazy right now in my head, I needed to write. I truly appreciate all of your love and support with my writing. 

This is a short series I’m working on. Does not follow the Supernatural storyline. Inner dialogue in italics. This is a work of fiction, not a reflection of real life. No disrespect to anyone. 

This is my own work, please do not take it or copy it without my permission. I wrote it fast and edited it fast. Please overlook any errors. 

Minors DNI 18+

Weeks had passed since the vampire hunt with the boys. The three of you were taking a much needed break in the bunker. You and Dean had noticed Sam was leaving the bunker more and would come back at odd hours of the night. 

“I think he’s seeing someone, Dean. I bet it’s Eileen.” You snickered while laying in his arms. “Well, good for him. She’s nice and can keep Sam in line. He deserves what we have.” He pulled you close. “I agree, but please don’t play big brother and interrogate him.” “What?! Me, never.” Dean chuckled. 

It was about 2 am when you crawled out of bed and went to get some water. You heard the bunker door open as softly as it could and soft footsteps come down the staircase. You stepped into the war room and waited. 

“Samuel Winchester, you’re home after curfew.” You laughed as you turned on the light. Sam jumped, “Ha ha, very funny. You scared the shit out of me, Y/N.” You laughed, “Sorry Sammy, but what’s got you sneaking in here at 2 in the morning?” You inquired. “I’m not sneaking.” He responded defensively. 

You smiled at him “Sam, whoever she is, I’m happy for you, we’re happy for you. You of all people deserve to be happy.” You hugged him. “Yeah, thanks Y/N. I appreciate it. We’ve been seeing each other for over a year now. Honestly, I’m in love with her.”

“Wow, Sam, that’s great. How does she feel about you?” You felt a pang of sadness and jealousy in your heart. Sam could say “I love you”, why couldn’t Dean? “Well, she loves me too. We both said it tonight. It took us completely by surprise. We had just…um..well, you know.” You nodded in understanding. “She was laying in my arms and I said it, then she said it. It was perfect.” 

“Oh, Sam. I’m happy for you. Now, who is it?!” You asked enthusiastically. “Um, well it’s Eileen.” “Ha! I knew it. I told Dean it was.” “What!? How did you know?” “Sam, we’ve practically grown up together, I know when you’ve got feelings for someone. It’s okay, your secret is safe with me.” You smiled, hugged him and walked back to your shared room with Dean after saying good night.

When you walked back into the room and saw your boyfriend sleeping peacefully on the bed. A pang of sadness filled you when you thought about Sam and Eileen confessing their love for each other. You knew Dean loved you, you just wished once you could hear him say it. 

Crawling back in the bed, you laid on your side with your back to him. Silent tears fell from your eyes and started to soak your pillow. Dammit, get yourself together, Y/N! He loves you, deeply and truly. You don’t need him to say it. He shows you he does every day. Of course, hearing it would just mean so much to you. Even if he said it once. To hear him utter those three words. 

You continued crying softly while arguing with yourself about the need to hear him say “I love you”. Eventually you stopped and fell back asleep. 

Dean woke up earlier than you. He looked over at you sleeping beside him. Your face was etched with pain. A sliver of light danced across your face and he saw dried tears on your cheeks. His heart filled with sorrow. Why didn’t I hear her crying, and why was she crying? God I hate seeing her like this.

Dean slowly pulled himself out of bed, trying not to disturb you. You shifted in your sleep, gave a soft, sad, moan and rolled over. Dean stood there staring at you for a few minutes, then left the room. 

His bare feet padded down the hallway, towards the kitchen. Sam was sitting at the table drinking coffee. “Hey ya, Sammy. What time did you get in last night?” Sam looked up from his coffee and said “About 2, did Y/N not tell you?” “She’s still sleeping, did she get up when you got home?” “Yeah, she scared the shit out of me when I came in. I wasn’t expecting her to be standing there.” Dean chuckled, “Yeah, no, she must have been planning to tell me she saw you when she got up. Hey, Sam, did she say anything to you? Like anything that’s bothering her? I noticed this morning she’d been crying.” Dean asked with concern in his voice.

Sam stood there thinking about your conversation, reality hitting him like a ton of bricks. “No, we chatted for a second and then she went to bed. She didn’t say anything or give me any indication something was wrong.” Sam knew. Of course he knew what was wrong. He told you that he and Eileen said “I love you” and he knew his brother had never said it to you. You acted like it didn’t bother you, but he knew deep down it hurt you. Everyone knew Dean was in love with you, but everyone knew it was hard for him to say it. Even to Sam, he couldn’t say it. 

Dean ran his hands through his hair and sighed. “Okay, thanks man. So, what brought you home so late?” Dean wiggled his eyebrows. Sam looked at his brother and laughed. “Dean, you’re such a child. I was out with a friend.” “Does this friend have a name?” 

Sam rolled his eyes, “Yes, she does. It’s Eileen. Are you happy, Dean?” Dean slapped Sammy on the back in a congratulatory way. “I am Sammy. You deserve to be happy, we both do.” “Yes, Dean, we all deserve to be happy.” Dean looked at Sam a little confused when he emphasized “all”. 

“What do you mean by that, Sam?” “Dean, we both know you love Y/N. What I don’t understand is why can’t you tell her?” “What are you talking about, I tell her that all the time.” “No you don’t Dean, you’ve never said those words to her, hell to anyone.” “Why do I have to say it? Aren’t you the one who always says “actions speak louder than words”?” “Yes, but sometimes it means something to actually say the words too.”

Dean got more irritated standing there. “I don’t have to defend my relationship with her to you or anyone. She knows I love her!” Sam threw his hands up in defeat, “okay, Dean. I won’t say another word.” Dean growled and walked out of the kitchen towards your room.

You were just waking up as he walked in. “Good morning, beautiful. How’d you sleep?” He kissed your forehead. “Okay I guess. I woke up and saw Sam come in about 2. I didn’t want to wake you.” You stretched. Dean sat down beside you on the bed with concern in his eyes. “Hey, you okay, sweetheart? It looks like you’ve been crying.” He took your hand. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just stupid hormones or some crap. I got in my own head last night. I’m sorry I worried you. I’m okay, I promise.” You leaned forward and kissed his lips. 

“Hey”, he tilted your face up to look at him. “You know how I feel about you, right?” “Yes, Dean. I know you love me. Why? Where is this coming from?” “Nothing, don’t worry about it. Just Sammy and I got into a little disagreement. It’s fine.” “Dean, you can talk to me. You know you can tell me anything, right?” He nodded and stood up. 

You stood up and hugged him tightly. You weren’t sure what they argued about, but part of you figured it had something to do with how he felt about you. “I’m going to jump in the shower, I’ll be in the kitchen soon.” You kissed his lips and grabbed some clothes. 

Dean got ready and walked back into the kitchen. He started cooking breakfast and Sam came back in. “Look Dean, I’m sorry. I was out of line. Your relationship with Y/N is none of my business. I know you two care deeply about each other. I’m happy you have each other.” Dean looked at Sam, “I appreciate it Sam. I get it, I have a hard time expressing myself, but I really do care deeply about her. Hell, I want to marry her one day and have some kids.” Sam turned and looked at his brother in surprise. “Damn Dean. That’s huge man. I’m happy for you, truly.” 

Dean nodded and thanked his brother. You came bounding into the kitchen and smiled at Dean and Sam. “Good morning, Sammy.” You winked. Dean chuckled, “I know about Eileen, Y/N. He spilled all his secrets this morning.” You laughed and looked at Sam “You told him everything?” Sam shot you a look and you kept quiet. 

“So what smells so good in here?” You walked over to the stove where Dean was cooking. “Bacon, of course.” You laughed. You grabbed some coffee and sat down at the table waiting for Dean to finish cooking. The three of you talked about looking to see if there were any jobs popping up, and you mentioned to Sam he should ask Eileen to come along. Dean laughed as Sam’s face turned red. 

When breakfast was done you started cleaning up the kitchen while the boys went to look for a job. You were just about finished washing dishes when Dean’s strong arms wrapped around your waist. He pulled you into him and started kissing your neck. “Dean, I need to finish cleaning.” You giggled. “It can wait. I want you.” He growled slowly in your ear. A chill went down your spine. 

Dean spun you around to face him and his lips captured yours in a heated kiss. You were pushed between him and the sink, with nowhere to go. Not that you’d want to leave his embrace. 

You moaned as he kissed down your neck and sucked on your pulse point. He took you by the hand and led you to your bedroom. As he pulled you in the room, he pushed you against the door closing it. Your hands went above your head and he held them there. Dean’s green eyes  turned dark with lust. You bit your lip. It turned you on seeing him want you so much. 

“Dean, I need you.” Dean let your hands down and pulled you to the bed. He laid you down carefully and hovered over you. His strong, calloused hands ran under your shirt, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. Your breath hitched as his hands cupped your breasts and he tugged at your bra. 

“Lean up baby, I want to take this off of you.” You leaned up and Dean took off your shirt and unhooked your bra. “Damn you’re so beautiful, and all mine.” He pulled his shirt off, exposing his perfectly toned chest. Your hands traced his body and his lips landed on your nipple while his hand cupped your other breast. 

You sucked in air and moaned loudly. You could feel your arousal pool between your thighs and his erection pushing on you. Dean kissed his way down your body and stopped at the waistband of your pants. “Please, Dean, I need you baby.” You lifted your hips helping him remove your pants and panties. 

You laid on the bed fully exposed. Dean stood and bit his lip. “Damn I can’t believe you’re mine.” You blushed, “all yours baby, now come on.” “Yes ma’am.” Dean smiled and removed his pants, his hardened length springing free. You laid back on the pillows and leaned up on your elbows watching as Dean stalked up the bed towards you. 

He climbed between your legs, using his to move them apart. He looked down and saw your core, soaking wet and ready for him. “You’re soaked, sweetheart.” “Mmhmm” you replied as his fingers brushed over your entrance. 

He slowly stuck his thick finger in and you moaned. Moving your hips into his hand as his thumb reached up and rubbed circles on your engorged clit. “Oh, Dean. Right there baby. Don’t stop.” You bucked into him as he added another finger. “Oh fuck, you’re so tight, sweetheart, and soaking wet.” Dean smirked as he felt your body responding to his touch.

He moved his fingers and thumb as you moved your body into his hand. He could feel you tightening around him, “mmmm, you’re close.” Your head fell back “Dean…I’m…gonna…cum.” Your breath hitched. He moved faster, helping you chase your release. “Yeah, cum for me princess.” With that you came undone. 

Dean moved his fingers and thumb as you writhed under him. Your body became sensitive to his touch and he kept going. “Oh, FUCK, DEAN!” You came again. Dean smirked. “Good girl, I knew you could cum again.” 

As Dean slowed and pulled his fingers out you moaned at the loss of fullness. Dean pumped his hard cock a few times before he lined himself up. He lined up at your entrance and slowly pushed in. You wrapped your legs around his waist and pulled him towards you. 

He thrusted in and bottomed out. You both let out a loud moan. “Oh damn, you’re so tight, Y/N.” Your hands went to his broad shoulders and he set a steady pace. He would pull out almost all the way and slam back into you. Each thrust had you gasping for air and grabbing his shoulders. 

“Oh, Dean. You feel incredible.” You moaned. Dean leaned down, kissing your lips, so do you baby. You were made for me.” Dean picked up the pace and you could tell he was chasing his release. He worked you faster and he felt his release coming. “I’m close, sweetheart.” “I want you to cum, Dean, please baby cum.” Dean thrusted a few more times and with a grunt he came, coating your walls with his seed. 

When Dean was done, he slowly pulled out and went to clean himself off. Once in the bathroom he realized he didn’t use protection. Oh, Fuck! Why didn’t I grab a condom? Shit! Dammit. He returned to the bedroom with a washcloth and started to clean you up. You were still overly sensitive and moaned at his touch. “Sorry sweetheart, just trying to clean you up. Um, I came inside you.” 

Your head shot up and your eyes were wide. “What?! Dean, we’ve always been so careful. Shit!” Dean hung his head, “I know. I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.” You took a deep breath and gently touched his face, “Hey, it’s okay. It’s not just your responsibility. We will figure it out together.” You smiled and kissed his lips. 

Dean laid beside you and pulled you close to him. You grabbed the sheet and covered the two of you and laid your head on his chest. You were listening to his heartbeat and watching his chest rise and fall with each breath. His heartbeat started to get faster as the two of you laid holding each other. 

“Dean, are you okay?” “Yeah, I’m good.” He ran his fingers lightly over your arm and pulled you even closer. Your eyes were getting heavy. “Hey, sweetheart?” “Hmm, yeah, Dean?” “Will you marry me?” You sat up with a gasp. “What?!” Dean leaned up and smiled “Will you marry me?” “Really?” “Yes, really.” He leaned over and pulled a small velvet box from the side table. Opening it, you saw a small diamond ring. You looked at it and then at Dean. Tears filled your eyes. “Yes, yes, Dean. I’ll marry you!” You squealed with delight. Dean chuckled and placed the ring on your finger. “Oh my god, I love you so much, Dean!” “Me too, sweetheart.” 

At that moment you didn’t care he couldn’t say the three little words. He showed you he loved you in so many other ways. Tonight, you were on cloud nine. You were going to be Mrs. Dean Winchester. 

Tags: @nescaveckdaily  @kr804573 @k-slla @jackles010378 @jawritter

@xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @roseblue373 @cheynovak @jassackles  @chriszgirl92

@suckitands33 @arcannaa @n-o-p-e-never @ladysparkles78 @smoothdogsgirl

@hobby27 @manicjk @stoneyggirl2

[odditycircus-2002]

Mortal Kombat 1 Intros with Medusa!Reader Part II

Li Mei

Y/N: Are you sure we cannot keep the traitor as a lovely ornament?

Li Mei: Reiko has to face trial like anyone else, Y/N.

/

Y/N: I still regret that I could not have done more for Sindel.

Li Mei: I know it pains you, but no one is accusing you of doing nothing.

/

Y/N: I am not sure I can give a testimony without trying to kill Shang Tsung on sight.

Li Mei: Justice cannot function properly unless you follow it thoroughly.

/

Y/N: I hope you're still not holding it against Syzoth for disturbing the lantern festival.

Li Mei: After everything he's done for the Empire? I'll let him off with a warning this time.

/

Li Mei: It is thanks to you that most of Sun Do's constables survived our battle with Shao and his allies.

Y/N: I am glad to hear they made full recoveries.

/

Li Mei: You must put your faith in justice.

Y/N: There is no such thing as it, the best I could hope for is revenge.

/

Li Mei: It still baffles me that you managed to slip away from me the first time you came to the palace.

Y/N: What can I say? I've always been the slippery type.

Kitana

Y/N: I am presuming that Li Mei wishes to speak with me about slipping hallucinogenic mushrooms into the rebel army's food supply.

Kitana: You did what now?!

/

Y/N wistfully: It seems like only yesterday to me that I helped bring you into the world.

Kitana: Time tends to fly by like that, Y/N.

/

Y/N surprised: I understand honoring Baraka, but Mileena wants to do the same with me?

Kitana: You have served Outworld with as much determination and loyalty as any honored soldier, Y/N

/

Y/N: I am truly sorry I couldn't save your mother.

Kitana: My family and I know more than anyone how hard you try to keep her alive.

/

Kitana: By the gods, NO! That is absolutely a cruel idea.

Y/N: How is throwing food that is secretly explosives worse than Shao weaponizing Onaga?

/

Kitana: Perhaps you should stop coming to the strategy meetings...

Y/N: Is this about my latest suggestion?

/

Kitana: You have a sister?

Y/N: Yes, but we're not as close as you and Mileena.

Liu Kang

Liu Kang: Even though he proves to be resilient, I’d be wary of Baraka loosing control.

Y/N: Have you forgotten I too was once a beauty now a turned beast?

/

Liu Kang: Baraka and his fellow Tarkatans view you as a beacon of hope for all you’ve done for them.

Y/N: Only because NO ONE elssse would help those poor unfortunate soulsss!

/

Liu Kang: Do not become tempted by Shang Tsung’s Well of Souls.

Y/N: If you had any chance of saving the one you loved from a cruel fate, wouldn’t you take it? /

Y/N: I asked you to kill me in a previous timeline???

Liu Kang: Kronika made it so you cannot go on without Shang Tsung. /

Y/N: I was a dangerous enemy in a past timeline, why didn’t you erase me for good?

Liu Kang: Because I had hoped that with better circumstances, you’d turn out kinder.

/

Y/N: I am grateful that you didn’t have me predestined to marry Shang Tsung

Liu Kang: As am I that you had an actual choice to choose who to love.

/

Y/N: I hope you do not expect I pray to you, not when I have to rely on myself to heal others.

Liu Kang: No, I do not need any of the sort, Y/N.

Kiu Liang (Scorpion)

Y/N: For freeing me from Shang Tsung and Quan-chi, I am in your debt till death.

Kiu Liang: I could not stand idly by and let the Sorcerers continue to use you.

/

Y/N: Thank you again for those earthrealm medical books you've gifted me.

Kiu Liang: May they prove to greatly help your cause.

/

Y/N: Truth be told, I envy that you and your new bride have life to look forward to together.

Kiu Liang: I understand why your heart would be in such turmoil.

/

Y/N: My venom is more than strong enough to overpower yours.

Kiu Liang: But can you take the force of my sting?

/

Kiu Liang: Baraka and the rest of the Colony are fortunate to have you as their healer.

Y/N: As is the Shirai Ryu for having you as Grandmaster.

/

Kiu Liang: I promise you, my clan and I will ensure that Bi-han is tried for his crimes-

Y/N angrily hisses: I do NOT care that he'sssss your brother! He must be cut like the tumor he is for hisssss attack on the colony!

/

Kiu Liang: You taught Outworlds High Mage hydromancy?

Y/N: Only the basics. He bringsssss me great shame for abusing the magic he's learned.

Sub-Zero (Bi-Han)

Y/N: Kuia-Liang will be disappointed that he's not the one who finished you.

Bi-Han: He will be disappointed to know you died thinking you could.

/

Y/N: You are plague to everything you touch.

Bi-Han: Only to those who would stand against me or my clan.

/

Y/N angrily and hissing: You killed my patientssss!!!

Bi-Han: I did them a favor by releasing them from their misery.

/

Y/N: Taking Shang Tsung's offer was a foolish mistake.

Bi-Han: You're right. I do not need his sorcery to bring power and glory to my clan.

/

Bi-Han: What manner of illness did you give my Lin Kuei, witch?!

Y/N patronizingly: I thought your clan was supposed to be stronger.

/

Bi-Han: I know your cold blood will stand no chance against my cryomancy.

Y/N: Actually, I ssstill remain warm-blooded.

/

Bi-Han: Your hydromancy has no chance against my cryromancy.

Y/N: Have you forgotten what ice is made from, Bi-han?

Rain

Rain: Why did you never teach ME how to control blood?

Y/N: I wished to spare you of the magic’s cost of madness.

/

Rain: I will always regret my crimes against Seido

Y/N: If you’re truly remorseful, then their ssssouls shall haunt you till the day you die. /

Y/N: I did NOT teach you how to control water, sssso you could dishonor me or your family!

Rain: I know how deeply I’ve shamed all of you. /

Rain: With the magic you know, why did you never pursue becoming High Mage?

Y/N: To avoid being overwhelmed with ambition asssss you were. /

Y/N: Your once cleansing water are ssssstained with the blood of Seido’s victims.

Rain: It is something I can never truly wash away. /

Rain: I have surpassed your water magic!

Y/N: How bold to assume that I’ve taught you EVERYTHING about water’s capabilitiessss.

/

Y/N: You want to come with ME into the Kytinn Hive???

Rain: So I can finally start my penance.

[joeybsversion]

Come Home

Joe Burrow x Reader

Joe sees you out with a new guy after your breakup.

“Shit.” You muttered. You’d recognize that laugh anywhere. You looked around the room through the crowd of people drinking, laughing, and dancing until you spotted him. Those damn Cartier glasses on his face complemented by a big smile.

“What’s wrong babe?” Your boyfriend asked, following your gaze across the room to see what or who you were looking at.

“Oh nothing,” you made yourself look busy and fumbled through your purse, “I thought I left my wallet up at the bar, but it’s right here.” You pulled it out and gave him a reassuring smile. “Should we sit right here?” You pulled out a chair from the high top and took a seat before he even answered.

“Works for me.” He grinned and took a seat. “Isn’t that some of the bengals players over there?” He motioned to a group of guys.

“Where?” You asked, acting like you hadn’t seen them already.

“I bet it is. Out celebrating after their win tonight. I heard they come here!”

“That’s cool!” You chimed in, acting as though you hadn’t been here on multiple occasions after games with Joe.

You took a sip of your drink, fixed your hair, and laughed at every word your boyfriend said, just doing your best to make yourself look busy and act like you hadn’t even noticed your ex boyfriend across the room. You’ve only been seeing your current boyfriend for a few months now. It’s been super casual and you hadn’t mentioned your previous relationship with Joe. It’s not like you’d been avoiding the conversation, you just hadn’t had the chance to say “Hey, you know your favorite quarterback, Joe Burrow? Yeah so him and I actually dated for 4 years. Things were super serious, but it just didn’t work out.” You let out a small laugh as the thought crossed your mind.

“What’s so funny?” Your boyfriend asked.

“Nothing.” You smiled “Just enjoying my drink.” You took another sip.

“I’ll go get you another one.” He smiled and left the table to join the crowd at the bar all trying to get a drink.

You pulled out your phone and scrolled through Instagram, singing along to the song that was on.

“Hey.” You felt a hand on your shoulder and heard a familiar voice behind you.

“Joe.. hey.” You acted surprised.

“Whose the new guy?”

“Skipping the small talk I see.” You rolled your eyes. “No one you know and honestly none of your business.” You turned back to your phone.

“Is it serious?” He continued.

“It’s serious enough.” You answered and he continued to stand next to you. “What? Why are you asking me these questions and why do you even care?” You asked. “You left me, remember?” You tilted your head to the side, waiting for a response. “So why do you care who I’m with? And if it’s serious or not? I’m happy, I’m at peace, and he loves me. I don’t pop into your life and disturb you. So please, stay out of mine.” You pressed your straw to your lips and took another big drink.

He continued to stare. “What? What do you want?” You asked.

“One more question and then I’ll leave.” He said. “How do you know he loves you?” You could hear the hurt in his voice.

You looked at your ex and shook your head, “because the way he looks at me when he thinks I’m not looking, is the way I use to look at you..”

You both stared at each other in silence. “I’m sorry… for how things ended.” Joe said and looked down. “I really am sorry.”

“Joe, to be completely real with you right now, getting over you was a horrific and traumatic thing to go through. I spent countless nights crying over someone who didn’t give me a second thought or an explanation for the pain they caused me. One day though, I began to heal.” You took a deep breath. “Now when I think about you, I remember the lessons you taught me and wish you the best.”

“Please don’t act like what happened to us was easy for me to go through.” You could hear the anger in his voice. “People always say that it hurts the most at night and apparently screaming into your pillow at 3 AM is the equivalent of being heart broken. But sometimes it would be 7 AM on a Tuesday morning and I’d catch a whiff of peppermint tea and it would make me miss you so much I wouldn’t know what to do.” He finished, letting out a big sigh and walking back over to his team.

You sat in silence, thinking over everything Joe had just said. Analyzing his words, and his facial expressions, and the way his voice cracked when he said he missed you so much he didn’t know what to do.”

“Sorry babe, long line.” Your boyfriend set your drink down and pressed a kiss to your forehead. “Everything ok?” He asked. “Earlier you were so giggly, and now you seem down.”

“Yeah, just not feeling very good all of a sudden.” You assured him.

“Too much to drink?”

“Something like that.” You turned to see Joe walking out of the bar alone. Pulling his hood over his head and keeping his face towards the ground. “Was he crying?” You thought to yourself. You turned around and the rest of the team was still celebrating.

“That is the Bengals!” Your boyfriend pointed in the direction you were already looking. “I asked the bar tender. He said they come here a lot after games. He said Joe was even here!” He looked around the group excitedly trying to catch a glimpse of his favorite quarter back.

You smiled back at him “cool.”

“I’m going to go close out our tab.. let’s get you home. Go get some fresh air, I’ll meet you out front.” He excused himself from the table again and made his way up to the bar.

You gathered your belongings and grabbed your phone. You felt a quick buzz and looked down, you had a missed call and voicemail from Joe.

You quickly pressed your phone to your ear. “Hey. I’m really not sure of much right now. But I am sure of one thing, I was in love with you.” You could hear his voice shaking over the phone. “I am still in love with you… and love isn’t something you give up on. So I’ve chosen not to give up on you. I won’t give up on you.” Your turned the volume up on your phone and pressed a finger into your opposite ear hoping to block out the noise of the busy bar. “One day, if you ever miss me, just know that you can come home to me…. Just come home already.” The message ended.

Butterflies somersaulted in your stomach as you rushed out the front door of the bar. You looked to your left and saw Joe climbing into the seat of a dark SUV.

“JOE! WAIT!!” You called after the car, attempting to wave it down as it pulled away from the curb. “Wait!” You yelled again, following in its direction.

The red break lights flashed bright as you continued to chase after it down the sidewalk. The door flung open and out came a hand “let’s go home, baby girl.”

[deafeningladyruins]

Carnival of Shadows

4: The Duality

The morning after the storm, she woke to the sound of birds chirping and sunlight filtering through the tattered fabric of the tent. For a moment, she felt a disorienting sense of peace, as if the darkness had been a mere dream. But as she turned her head, she saw Art the Clown sitting nearby, his eyes closed as if in a trance. She rose quietly, not wanting to disturb him. Stepping outside, she inhaled the fresh, damp air, the carnival looking almost serene in the morning light. It was a stark contrast to the eerie atmosphere of the night, and she marveled at the duality of this place that seemed to mirror her own troubled mind.

As she walked through the carnival, she reflected on the previous night. Art's silent companionship had provided a strange comfort she had never felt before. Her thoughts were interrupted by a faint rustling sound. She turned to find Art standing in the doorway of the tent, watching her intently.

"Good morning," she said softly, unsure if he could hear her. "I didn't want to wake you."

Art tilted his head, his smile ever-present. He beckoned her to follow him, and she found herself intrigued by the promise of discovering more about him. They wandered through the carnival, Art leading her to a neglected garden overrun with wildflowers and weeds. It was a hidden oasis, a place of unexpected beauty amidst the decay.

"How did you find this place?" she asked, her eyes wide with wonder.

Art didn't respond, but his gesture encompassed the entire garden. He then motioned for her to sit on a crumbling stone bench. She obliged, and Art began to gather some of the wildflowers, creating a bouquet with surprising skill and care. He handed it to her, and she smiled, touched by the unexpected gesture.

"Thank you," she whispered, her voice thick with emotion. "I never knew you could be so gentle."

Art's eyes softened, and for a moment, she glimpsed the person behind the grotesque facade. It was a fleeting moment, but it spoke volumes about the duality of his nature—his capacity for both horror and tenderness. As the days turned into weeks, they continued their nightly meetings at the carnival. She began to see more of Art's dual nature. During the day, he would show her the hidden beauty of the carnival, teaching her to see the world through his eyes. At night, he became her guardian, warding off the demons that tormented her mind.

One evening, while exploring a forgotten funhouse, she stumbled upon an old trunk filled with costumes and props. She laughed, pulling out a feathered mask and twirling around, feeling a rare moment of joy. Art watched her with amusement, then picked up a top hat and placed it on his head, joining her in the impromptu performance.

"You're not so scary when you're having fun," she teased, her laughter echoing through the funhouse.

Art's silent laugh was infectious, and they spent the evening playing dress-up, momentarily forgetting the darkness that surrounded them. It was in these moments of light-heartedness that she saw the true depth of their bond. They were two souls navigating a world that had cast them aside, finding solace in each other's company. As the night deepened, they sat side by side on a rusted merry-go-round, watching the stars twinkle above. She leaned her head on Art's shoulder, feeling a warmth that had been absent from her life for so long.

"Art," she began hesitantly, "do you ever wish things were different? That we didn't have to hide in the shadows?"

Art turned to face her, his eyes reflecting a sadness she hadn't seen before. He reached out and gently cupped her cheek, his touch conveying the words he couldn't speak. In that silent exchange, she understood that while they could not change their pasts, they could find a semblance of peace in each other. As they sat there, entwined in the darkness, she felt a renewed sense of hope. Their world was far from perfect, but it was theirs—a realm where the light and dark coexisted, just as they did. It was a place where they could be themselves, free from judgment and fear.

One night, Art decided to surprise her with a special outing. He led her to a part of the carnival she had never seen before, where the rides were still functional, albeit in a state of disrepair. With a flourish, he presented her with a ticket, and she couldn't help but laugh at the absurdity of it all.

"Are we really going to have a date at the carnival?" she asked, her eyes sparkling with excitement.

Art nodded, his smile widening. He took her hand and led her to the first ride—a creaky old Ferris wheel. As they ascended, she felt a rush of exhilaration, the world below shrinking into insignificance. They rode the Ferris wheel, the carousel, and even the bumper cars, laughing and enjoying each moment as if they were carefree children. Art went out of his way to ensure she had fun, his antics bringing a smile to her face at every turn. He won her a stuffed animal at one of the game stalls, his silent determination endearing him to her even more. As the night wore on, they found themselves back at the Ferris wheel, the lights of the carnival casting a magical glow around them.

As they reached the top, she turned to Art, her heart full of gratitude and affection. "Thank you, Art. This has been the best night of my life."

Art's eyes softened, and he leaned in closer, his face inches from hers. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest, the anticipation building. Slowly, he closed the distance between them, his lips brushing against hers in a tender, lingering kiss. It was a moment of pure connection, a silent promise of the bond they shared.

As the Ferris wheel descended, she knew that their love, though unconventional and shrouded in darkness, was real. They had found each other in the most unlikely of places, and together, they would face whatever challenges lay ahead.

---

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Follow me for more Art the clown

[bleedinqdove]

Hi! Can I request headcanons for how Rocky would go about his feelings for a reader that's the niece of Sedgewick?

Rocky Rickaby with a reader who’s the niece of Wick.

A/n: I got a bit carried away with this request as you see…but I hope you enjoy anon cause I had so much fun writing this!

SFW.

(Couldn’t stop myself from adding a song)

-First of all, I want to say this gives off major lady and the tramp vibes.

-Since Wick himself is rich and influential, no doubt your family is too.

-And then there’s Rocky a rum runner and a fellow who does odd jobs for the Lackadaisy Speakeasy

-You two met at the Little Daisy Cafe when you were with your Uncle Wick.

You quickly got bored as your Uncle was busy talking with some pretty lady named Mitzi. You rolled your eyes as you turned your head to look at something more interesting…and less disturbing than your Uncle’s flirting.

And you do find something that catches your eye! Looking over your seat you spot a grey tabby pouring a rather alarming amount of syrup on his pancakes. Your eyebrows raise in intrigue as a smile crosses your lips. You look over into his booth, tilting your head slightly.

“Well, ain’t that interesting…I’ve never seen anyone who liked syrup this much.” You said with a light-hearted chuckle.

The grey tabby raises his head to look up at you before he flashes a sharp smile a proud look on his face. “You’d be hardpressed to find a gentleman who likes pancakes n’ syrup more than me!”

You giggled at his response before shaking your head a smirk playing on your lips. “Do you have a name, Mister? Or would Sir-Pours-A-Lot suffice?”

“Rocky, Rocky Rickaby…and you? Miss…?” He asked raising an eyebrow.

“Sable. Y/n Sable.”

-And the two of you continued to chat after that, which didn’t escape Ivy’s attention. Right before you left, Ivy slipped a small black pin of a clover into your hands and whispered something in your ear.

-Which kickstarted a whole new life for you.

-Almost every other night you snuck out to the speakeasy…excited to see a particular pancake-loving cat.

-At first, when Rocky met you he was quite intrigued by your curious behavior, and not to mention those witty comebacks of yours.

-You two just played off each other so well…so it wasn’t surprising he found himself falling rather hard.

-He’d look forward to those nights you did come to visit the speakeasy, talking to you about his exciting rum running adventures.

-It’s almost like he was trying to impress you…and he was! The way you looked at him with such awe and intrigue every time he told you a story stroked his ego just a tiny bit…

-You, being the sheltered thing you are, found the stories very interesting, even wishing you were there.

-Yet despite all these feelings of admiration and elation, Rocky couldn’t help but feel insecure…and a little jealous.

-Your wealth and status were apparent, you were Wick’s niece after all!

-If you two were ever to be in a relationship, your parents would most definitely never approve.

-Not to mention he’s already plagued with thoughts that you’ll leave him for a better, richer man…and he couldn’t blame you…but the thought makes him feel sick with jealousy and sadness.

-But every time he was caught in his doubtful thinking you’d flash him that pretty smile of yours and he’d find himself falling head over heels all over again.

-What can I say? he’s a fool for you!

-And being so he can’t himself getting closer and closer to you.

-Neither can you.

-Despite knowing this relationship was probably doomed you couldn’t help but fall further as well, you were young, dumb, and in love after all. The recipe for a perfect beautiful disaster.

Sitting against a tree with your head resting against his shoulder you closed your eyes and sighed, feeling the cold chill of the night air. You slowly opened your eyes and looked up at Rocky, parting your lips to speak.

“You think we can actually do this?”

He’s silent for a moment before he looks down and places his hand over yours, that signature sharp-toothed smile on his face.

“Well, I made it this far, Haven’t I?”

[gasolinehornet]

Little rosekiller microfic i wrote a while ago, when the "i wish u were a girl" thing was trending

barty was quiet beside Evan, where they both sat leaning against an old desk. They used to talk all the time, silence wasn't really their thing. and still they sat there, in silence, sipping on their own cheap beer.

Only about an hour ago Evan heard a knock on his door. and to his surprise, barty crouch jr was standing there, asking to come in. He explained in a short non detailed story about how his father had 'kicked him out for the night' though he didn't further explain what that entailed.

he wasn't even sure the guy knew himself.

But Evan being Evan, and barty being his best friend; He was allowed to come in.

And so, here they were, sitting in complete and kinda disturbing silence. Evan didn't know what barty was thinking about, but he sure as hell knew what he himself was thinking. Evan was never that big a fan of silence. It gave him too much room to think. it was harsh and unforgiving. The silence was a way to tell you something was wrong; and something definitely was.

Something was wrong with barty.

"Do you ever think about the future?" He heard beside him, Evan didn't say anything for a few seconds.

"Yes? I mean.. Sometimes." he answered with an unsure voice, not really sure where barty was going with this. "I'm not gonna have one. " Evan blinked a few times, even more unsure of what to say. "Can you elaborate? "

"Evan.. You wouldn't understand. " Evan got annoyed by this and tried again. "No come on, continue, please. " he answered in a calm voice.

"You wouldn't understand. "

Evan got angry quick. He had always had this problem. And before he could simmer down he turned to look fully at barty and talked loudly. "Then make me understand! "

"He kicked me out Evan!" He shouted "I don't have a home, no money, no one to get anything from. I'm doomed, Evan!"

"I'm sorry he kicked you out, but I've told you this barty. You can stay with me, I'v- I have enough money and, and we could go somewhere he can't get us and-" he was talking quickly, trying to get a coherent sentence out when he suddenly shut up. bartys eyes were almost swimming in tears, why wouldnt barty let him fix this?

"I wish you were a girl." He said.

Evan was kinda stunned by this for an obvious amount of reasons. Then it was quiet again, he was unsure of what to respond to that. He knew they had a weird relationship with eachother but they almost vowed to never mention it after. It was a silent agreement. Was he referencing those nights? Evan was just purely confused by what was happening, and he started to get the feeling that it was near the end of them.

then they kissed and made out, the end!

[lady-rosceline-hurst]

[BREAKING NEWS]

A prominent member of the House of Remembrance has suffered a major security breach after a random omninet denizen took umbrage to a post by said member.

While an obvious shame upon Lady Rosceline Hurst, the true bombs have come from opportunistic hackers who seized upon this abrupt act of digital-terrorism. While it didn't take long for this breach to be sealed and digital defenses to be upgraded, the past few hours have shown this was too late.

This morning the Omninet was flooded with a nigh-unprecedented amount of leaks. Years of private correspondence between the honored Lady Rosceline Hurst and various other notable figures laid bare for all to see. Some of which is quite... scandalous and unsuited for our program. Though the gossip-drama industrial complex will be fueled by them weeks, perhaps even months, to come.

However what is truly of consequence is the political and economic scheming which has been revealed. The average Karrakin citizen has been given a glimpse into the dirty backrooms of our illustrious state.

Lord Reginald Halifax of the House of Stone has already began to use this incident to continue his crusade against non-baronic peoples, while also decrying the weakness of The House of Remembrance to allow such a thing to occur. Lord Amelia Fraceux of the House of Water has stated that the honorable Lady Hurst provoked this heinous digital-terrorism with, quote, "An arrogant attitude almost as antiquated as our governmental structure." Lord Fraceux is as candid and provocative as always.

Whatever your opinion, stay tuned as we continue to report on the ongoing fallout of this developing situation!

...<DATABASE RECONSTRUCTION COMPLETE>

...<OMNINET CONNECTION SECURE>

...

With the situation handled and our systems back online, the time hath come for me to release on official statement on behalf of mine illustrious House. I shall begin by responding to the uncouth statements by mine fellows in the Houses of Stone and Water.

To the Venerable Lord Amelia Fraceux, I admit I find thine statement on both mine 'attitude' and our illustrious state both disturbing and surprising. This most heinous attack was forsooth carried out by an unshackled NHP of Horus. The behavior of such a demon is most erratic and I assure thee I did naught to provoke it. Thine implication that this terrorist was in any way justified speaks more to thine character than to mine own.

To the Honourable Lord Reginald Halifax, I must express grave disappointment. Whilst our Major Houses art disparate in political affiliation, many of us in the Interest art able to work around these petty squabbles. Mine Illustrious House of Hurst, Jewel of Crossland, doth have good relations with several Minor Houses of Stone upon Upper Laurent. I have already received correspondence from several members of such Houses, whom did wish mine House a speedy recovery and did denounce thine use of this data breach as an excuse to attacketh the great House of Remembrance. Prithee, speakest with more concern for thine cousins and their interests in future. I shall forgive thee, for thou art clearly ignorant of the Dawnline Shore's politics.

On that topic, as a general statement to those of the Concern, I must explain some intricacies of mine House's situation. On a relatively new, still developing colony such as Crossland, expenditures and costs are great for any minor house. I have spent more than a few late nights awake, speaking with mine dear cousin, the House Hurst Treasurer, whist he hath argued against mine requests for an increased cyber security budget. In the end, it seems I was right to worry about such things, but even after this attack I do see the Lord's side. With Harrison Armory barbarians so abundant in the Shore and pirates stalking either side of mine homeworld's dwarf star system, our military spending is equally important. Forsooth, I would allow mine personal correspondence to leaketh one hundred times to keep mine people safe and sound. In the coming weeks, House Hurst will taketh action to ensure that both of these needs are met in future.

The leaks are many and I shall address them individually, mine response is already quite long.

I thank thee, good people of the Baronies, and wish thee a fair morrow.

-Lady Rosceline, Heiress of Illustrious House Hurst, Jewel of Crossland

[hoxooster]

On the DesBea situation:

I would've added my thoughts to the original post, but as I am not a part of their Discord server, I didn't think that that was any bit appropriate. However, I wanted to share some of my own personal experiences with her, so that y'all can see that her behavior in their server is a continuing pattern--I don't have pictures of what she said as proof, sadly, but I will explain why.

I'm also gonna slap this under a Read More. I apologize for its length, but the original callout post should be enough of an explanation as to why this post needs to be as long as it is.

And, as a quick aside, if any of you wish to completely block DesBea, NOT HARASS HER OR FEED INTO HER BEHAVIOR IN ANY WAY, be aware that her usernames are:

commence-screaming

des-paa-cee-toeee

pd3thoughts

If any of you know of any more, please tell me, and I will update this post. I don't want to be around her anymore than most people who've also interacted with her do.

About 2 years ago, I was invited to lilspacewolfie's server, Red's Ramblers, and I very quickly became a moderator there. Over time some people joined and a few left, but Ramblers remained stable through it all. DesBea joined later on into the server's lifespan, was around for awhile, said some nasty things, was given a warning (in the general), and just left without saying anything one day. After reading the screenshots in the callout post, I'm actually quite surprised by how much of a fit she threw in her efforts to make you guys apologize to her. Much like in the original post, with her gone from the server, things improved for everyone else, but the whole ordeal was rather confusing for all of us, in the aftermath.

See, DesBea was trying to be just as harmful in Ramblers, but it never really went anywhere.

Her hateful and self-pitying tendencies were the same around us as it was in their server. She really loved to talk shit about Yadoking and her writing--she would do this both in passing on random posts in the server, and while some of us were in-call when we'd play Payday 2 together as a group. It never smacked of genuine criticism for Yado's writing ability or style, as she only ever used childish language when doing it, and she would always do it right before she would try to push her own ideas and fics onto any of us who were online at the time. She was even trying to bully lilspacewolfie--which I will go more into later--over the tiniest of things. DesBea, in all of her posts, was either pushing someone else down, trying to make us all read about her rather disturbing fic ideas or headcanons, or trying to make herself look like the victim by claiming that she 'had bad experiences with abuse in the past' and that her 'PTSD was triggered over something someone in Ramblers had said' when we were trying to halt her bullshit.

It was all very aggravating to deal with, to say the least, but it also didn't have very much staying power, since most of us were just ignoring her in the server. And I do mean that, as most of the users in the Ramblers Discord server refused to interact with her posts over time, and people usually ignored her whenever she tried to insert herself into their conversations. It's probably why she left without much of a fight when lilspacewolfie posted "If you're being an asshole in this server, you better stop that shit right now" in the general chat. (That's not what she said, but y'all get the jist.)

Now, as for her bullying behavior in the server, I can't say for certain if she was targeting anyone besides lilspacewolfie (and badmouthing Yado from time to time, who wasn't even in the server), as I'm not a very outgoing or talkative individual. Despite the length of this post, I'm naturally quite taciturn, and even though I was a moderator in Ramblers, nobody in the server ever messaged me about any issues that they were having with anyone. But, I can say with accuracy that DesBea would go out of her way to harass lilspacewolfie--the creator and owner of the Red's Ramblers Discord server. Whenever she would join calls while we were playing together (but she was just watching from the server), she would only ever type in the voice chat channel, where she would wax poetic about her own fics and get rather offended that 'lilspacewolfie was intentionally ignoring her'. If we were playing a game of Payday 2 with her, DesBea would intentionally follow lilspacewolfie around as a character that she didn't particularly care for and spam callouts to scare and irritate her. And, when another user in the server was having an issue that caused them a lot of distress and made them go quiet for awhile (which had nothing to do with anyone or anything in Ramblers, when they were asked about it), DesBea tried to blame lilspacewolfie for it based on a lighthearted joke that she had made that dogged on Houston. So, not only was she trying to harass lilspacewolfie, but she was actively trying to turn others in the server against the owner of the Discord, as if she could muscle her out by making her out to be a villain.

Over a joke about a FICTIONAL character.

Because she started insinuating that lilspacewolfie had caused another user to 'go into a depressive spiral, and chased them away from the server with her insensitive comments about Houston', I got involved to shut that shit down. DesBea was always weirdly attached to me, because she had DM'd me a few times on Tumblr in the past. I can only guess that she thought that these few smatterings of messages made me her friend, and since, apparently, some people here think of me as being "Mr. John Payday", she figured that she could use me as an intimidating wall to hide behind whenever she was called out on her bullshit.

She was wrong.

After a while of still trying to get others in the server to hate lilspacewolfie for 'being mean to one of the other users in the server'--who ended up coming back once their mental health had improved, by the way--she finally left after the "Stop being a dick" post, and it took us a couple days to notice. So, all-in-all, it was a very weird and irritating experience, but, in this context, it shows a worrying trend of behavior that she ended up spreading to other servers.

Now, like I kind of glossed over earlier, I WAS a moderator in Red's Ramblers. (I ended up leaving the server last month due to personal reasons that're not germane to this situation, and I have no desire to talk about it on this forum.) As I was still a mod before I left, I took the time to delete every post and reaction made by people who were no longer in the server--this amounted to 7 people, DesBea included. So, all of her posts that I could've screencapped as evidence are gone, and even if they were still there, I wouldn't have access to them anymore, anyway. In fact, the only thing that I have left is this picture I took of my response to her whole "You're a bad person for hating Houston" spiel that she was going on and on about:

(I censored this to give some privacy to the person who DesBea tried to use as a cudgel to smack lilspacewolfie with blame for their condition at the time. Even though most people here probably won't recognize them from their in-server nickname, I didn't want to take any chances.)

But, anyway, as you have read from the callout post and these personal anecdotes that I have provided, her behavior in their server was an unsurprising, but also a very worrying trend that has effected at least 2 Discord servers and a good chunk of some of the people who were or still are in the Payday fandom.

If anything that y'all have read over these posts has angered any of y'all to the point of harassing her, PLEASE DON'T. Don't send her hate--anonymously or not. Don't engage with her. Just block her and make sure that others in the fandom are aware of her behavior, so they can avoid her if they wish to as well.

And, again, please tell me if she's operating under any usernames other than the ones I've listed. I was tired of her bullshit a long time ago, and I have no desire to entertain her further under yet another pseudonym.

[violent-optimism]

A (somewhat organized) collection of thoughts/things I noticed from the new TF #7 Comic (Spoilers!) - Part 2

The Administrator's Death and Everyone's Reaction

Yeah, I think we all knew this was coming too. But I don't think we were prepared for just how it would happen. We knew from the end of the last comic that Admin only had 1 hour left to live. And what did she do with it?

She completely wasted it. And as anti-climactic as that might seem I think that's exactly the point. She wasted her whole unnatural life in fact, and for what? Just to wither away and fade to dust with nothing and no one.

I freaking loved seeing the merc's individual reactions and seeing everyone walk away one by one as the panels progressed. Soldier and Sniper taking their hats off in respect. Spy, Scout and Miss Pauling frozen in shock. Medic and Heavy trying to comfort each other. Even Pyro looks visibly disturbed. (Demo's the only one we can't see which is too bad).

There's no words said. Because really, what CAN they say?

Miss Pauling's Choice

Kind of tying into what I said in my last post. I LOVE the way this is drawn alongside Engie's words. You get a real sense that she's being actively tempted by the Australium, but at the same time she's completely horrified by it because now she TRULY understands the devastation its capable of.

To be clear, I don't think Engie is trying to tempt her here. I think he's just trying to show her what her choices are. And perhaps, for the first time in her life, she actually COULD do anything she wanted. Not just second in command, but FULLY in command in the seat of power.

But she passes the test of course, and realizes she wants nothing to do with it. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if she quit her job right after the scene where she asks Engie if he knows any "deep trenches".

Side note: We finally get a first name confirmation for Miss Pauling!! Engie calls her "Flo" a couple times, which I assume is short for "Florence" as I'm not sure what else it could be a nickname for. That's awesome!!

Heavy and Sniper rescuing Soldier

This is just me more or less fan-girling about Sniper any chance I get. But when I tell you I practically SCREAMED when I realized he was there, I ain't lying lol

The thing is, Heavy could have chosen ANYONE to help him rescue Soldier, and he chose Sniper. I just think that's fucking rad. And I actually kind of like the fact that he doesn't even take a shot the entire time. He just holds his laser on the guy menacingly lol

Kind of wish he would have at least gotten a line here but ah well.

Side note: Heavy rocks that beard, holy shit! It's like Captain America all over again.

Scout is now a DAD

There's SO much to unpack here but I'll try my best to make it short lol

I think it's obvious to state that Scout has been, um...very productive these last 7 years! Honestly he does strike me as the type to want a lot of kids. And he might not be a perfect dad but you just know he would try his best and he would be a FUN dad if nothing else.

I'm not the first one to point this out, but I think it's interesting how we see the single-parent cycle continue with Scout. Kind of an interesting subversion on a common trope to have the MOM be the one to disappear or be a "deadbeat". I kind of wished we could have seen Scout's Ma at the dinner, but that's okay.

Am I a fan of Scout's extremely 70s hairstyle? No, not really lol but goddamn if seeing him as a dad didn't make me at least a little bit emotional.

Also, I laughed WAY too hard at the "my boys can swim" joke. Gosh, that's funny. I need to make another post talking about all my favourite jokes in this new comic.

The final panel

Holy...fucking...shit if this didn't RUIN me.

I will admit it took me an embarrassing amount of time to realize that Scout was talking to the READER, and we hadn't just shifted to the first person of a different character. But when I did finally clue into it, wow...that hit somewhere deep in my soul.

I have a sneaking suspicion that the writers may have tweaked the ending. Not just to reflect the long hiatus between comic issues but how long we've been on this journey with the characters in general. Scout saying stuff like "We're glad you stuck around" and "we've been through a lot, you and us," like FUCK how does that not tug at your heartstrings??

I teared up. Not gonna lie. They're a family and WE are a part of it! Everyone is so HAPPY and got their ending and everyone's ALIVE!

I don't care what anyone says. THIS is the ending the mercs deserved. After all they've been through (especially Sniper, one of the few who no longer has a bio family of his own), they deserved to live and get their ending. And it just makes me so happy that even after 7 years being busy with their own lives they would still make time to get together like this?? WHOLESOME!!!

Yeah sure, maybe it's cheesy and a little rosy, but after all the shit that 2024 threw at us, honestly...I think we all needed this. It felt very therapeutic. And although a part of me is kind of sad that the comic is over, my gratitude for it FINALLY being completed far outweighs my grief. I look forward to people analyzing and picking this issue apart even further for months (or even years) to come!

Thank you for the lovely Christmas gift, Valve.

[yo1gi]

summary: you meet isagi at a coffee shop because of a strawberry parfait

warnings: isagi is rather popular in this scenario, flirty isagi at the end? not proofread

strawberry sunday

you were bored out of your mind while trying to finish some of your homework before school tomorrow at a coffee shop nearby your house.

you had been procrastinating about doing homework during the weekends which ended in everything pilling together. you hoped that the change in location will lighten the glum mood of doing homework. (it didn’t)

you were desperately trying to forget that you had even more worksheets and question papers stacked in front of you ; right beside them was a cup of peach ice tea that arrived not too long ago and it was the only thing keeping you going at the moment.

you mentally groaned, wishing you can just relax now with no worries about your lame homework. you were literally daydreaming at this point - mind so caught up in your own world.

“oh, didn’t expect to see you here!" a bright voice that sounded a bit too familiar disturbed your train of thought.

you glanced at the source of the sound, only to see the one and only isagi - your school’s sweetheart.

puzzled was all you felt during that time. you weren’t exactly the closest to him but you had a fair share of greetings with each other, he was the nice popular boy in school after all. plus, he played football which made him gain lots of fangirls as well, though you also couldn’t quite deny that he was an attractive boy.

“hi?” was all you could say to the blue-eyed boy. you were extremely confused. were both of you friends? could you guys even be labelled as friends with the minimal interaction you guys have?

“mind if i sit here?”

you gaped at him in silence, never in your life expecting his question. you could kinda tell he was oblivious to the awkward conversation he had just continued when he was still grinning joyfully, flexing you with his signature cute boy smile. ngl it charmed you

“uh, sure.”

you were of course, reluctant but you didn’t have the heart to reject the smiley boy in front of you.

“i rarely see you around, what brings you here today?”

you were glad that he was the one that strike the conversation because you obviously weren’t going to.

“just wanted a change in location, what about you?”

“i heard from a couple of friends that the strawberry parfait here was good, so i came to see what’s the hype all about!”

you chuckled lightly, slightly surprised about the sudden enthusiasm from isagi.

“sorry, i got overexcited! i just really like strawberry desserts.” he quickly shared as his hands scratched the nape of his neck.

you didn’t know the isagi yoichi had such an awkward side to him. he was usually a lot more carefree and outgoing in school. you were weirdly attracted to his cute demeanour.

“it’s okay, i like them too.” you continued as you tried to reassure the embarrassed boy which to your attempt, did. his big blue eyes brightened after hearing what you said. you can’t help but stare into them; they were very pretty.

“really? we could share the parfait, i don’t mind!”

your eyes slightly widened as you were caught off guard by his straight forward question. it’s not everyday that you have a cute boy sharing his beloved strawberry parfait with you.

“oh no, you should enjoy it, you really wanted to try it, didn’t you?”

“i did but i don’t mind sharing because it’s you.” he said nonchalantly.

you froze. you had to do a double take on what he said. it was quite a lot to take in for your racing heart.

as you were about to ask him about it, you were unfortunately cut off by a voice.

“hi, here’s your strawberry parfait, please enjoy!”

at this point, you weren’t even listening, your mind was still stuck at that moment.

there was an inner turmoil present in your mind. would it be weird if i ask him about it now? you thought hard for an answer.

your answer: whatever, i’ll just ask him. i’m way too curious to stop now.

“hey isagi..” you escape your train of thoughts, only to see him staring at you - the parfait untouched.

“hm?”

you were taken aback with his stare that you have completely forgotten your purpose of calling him and it ended with you all over the place.

“why is it suddenly so hot in here?” you chuckled nervously while your hands reached for your ice tea, avoiding eye contact with the boy in front of you at the same time.

“is it? i think it’s fine though,” you’re not even sure if he did it on purpose or is just awfully oblivious, “have some dessert to cool you down!”

he scooped up a good amount of it on the spoon and moved it towards my mouth. he isn’t going to feed me, is he?

he certainly is.

you froze pt 2. you definitely didn’t expect this from him.

“come onn, my hands getting tired.” he complained with a small pout on his lips. how is he so cute?!

you reluctantly ate it from the spoon, though you were extremely flustered at the sweet gesture. you were about to explode.

“how was it?” he asked sweetly before feeding himself the long awaited goodness.

the gears in your brain were turning. wait. hold on.

it was the same spoon.

your cheeks flushed red at the thought of the indirect kiss you just had. you were slowly starting to believe that he’s doing this on purpose.

“it’s really good!” isagi exclaimed, “i really like it, do you like it?

you mustered up all the energy you had left with a small yes.

“it’s really sweet though..”

“yeah, kind of.”

“like you.”

that was all your weak heart could take. let’s just say you got scolded by your teacher for unfinished homework because your brain was too busy with having that certain scenario playing on repeat.

[seramilla]

Sometimes Carmilla forgets Sera's as powerful as Lucifer, not that she undermines Sera, it's just that the latter uses her powers very scarcely. So at one of their dates when a crazed sinner(either incredibly high or just has personal beef with Carmilla) lunges at them Sera nonchalantly snaps her fingers, poofing the sinner away and continues to talk about whatever she was talking out earlier leaving Carmilla confused until she remembers her akwardly tall wife is literally the most powerful thing in the universe right after God themself.

Not many Sinners are dumb enough to ever challenge Carmilla directly, or even approach her on the street, for that matter. Unless they're another overlord, it's downright unheard of. Most of the people in Pentagram City who have been in Hell for any length of time understand the hierarchy; they know any of the overlords could remove their spines in the time it takes to blink if they step out of line.

The only exception to this being newly dead souls, or ones too stupid or under the influence of illicit substances to be able to think clearly. That's what happens one day when Carmilla and Sera are just out for an early evening stroll. They're close enough to Rosie's neighborhood that they should be relatively safe -- except the random person that tries to attack them must not have gotten the memo.

Maybe they have some of their faculties about them, at least, because they don't immediately go for Carmilla. Instead, they turn their attention to her companion: the tall, delicate-looking angel walking beside her, chatting nonchalantly without a care in the underworld, laughing at Carmilla's admittedly awful, corny jokes.

The vision of a body launching itself at Sera catches Carmilla's eye. In the time it takes to draw a breath, her claws are already out, ready to strike. Her instincts are honed and lightning fast, after years of battle and making a stand here in Hell; she's ready to defend her wife at all costs.

She almost does. Except, with a snap of Sera's fingers, the Sinner is suddenly gone, with a poof of silver cloud vapor, followed by a few sparkles of light just for effect. Sera's hair rustles from the air disturbed by this person's passing; that's how close they'd been before he disappeared. Any evidence of the Sinner's presence is simply not there, as if they'd never been threatened at all.

Carmilla blinks. She blinks again. There had just been a person there, fangs and claws out, not more than a hair's breadth from raking against Sera's supple skin. The fact that they are now nonexistent does not quite catch up with her brain for another couple of seconds. She looks at where the person had been, and then at Sera, and then at the blank ground again.

"What?" Carmilla squeaks.

"What do you mean 'what?'" Sera asks.

"Where did they go?"

"I teleported them, of course."

"Wait...that's something you can do? They're not dead?"

"Of course not," Sera responds, as if the answer should be obvious. "I didn't see any need for that. I teleported them to your friend Zestial. He can sort them out. We're busy having a nice time, aren't we?"

Carmilla blushes. "Yes..."

Carmilla looks at Sera, smitten. She really is more dastardly and diabolical than Carmilla gives her credit for. Zestial won't be happy when he learns what that Sinner had tried to do to them...they may have wished that they had died again, after all, by the time Zestial is through with them. He's good at giving his victims a fate worse than death.

"Carmilla? Are you coming?"

Carmila hadn't noticed Sera is farther ahead on the street than her now. She jogs to catch up.

As usual, her angelic wife is always so full of surprises. Carmilla can't wait to become more acquainted with how that beautiful, mischievous brain works in the years ahead. Oh, how she's missed Sera, so.

[the-starry-seas]

hmmm a little royal ot3 angst from breha's perspective, i think

She's frustrated enough that she lets the door slam behind her. She expects the echo of it, but what she doesn't expect is the second noise of a datapad falling to the floor.

Fox is sitting in the bay window, staring at her, a thick blanket half over his legs to ward off the night chill. Even from across the room, she can see his tense shoulders and wide eyes.

"I'm sorry," she grits out, pressing a hand to her forehead, wishing her voice was calmer, wondering if she should leave. "I didn't know you were in here, I wouldn't have slammed the door."

"It's okay." He leans to pick up the datapad, and she wonders if he's intentionally avoiding her gaze. He does that a lot, when he's nervous.

Or he just needs to see where the datapad is and you're overthinking things.

She sighs and turns back to the door. She hates when she and Bail argue like this, and she hates the look in Fox's eyes when he overhears. He was obviously comfortable, with the pillows behind him and the mug steaming at his side, and she doesn't want to disturb him.

"Breha," he says, and she stops with her hand on the doorknob. "We can sit in front of the fire."

They can. That was why she came here in the first place, because sometimes what she really needs is to lay down on that massive fur and listen to the fire crackle. She doesn't know why it's calming, but it works all the same. And she wants to calm down. She wants to be calm, and she wants Bail to be calm, and she wants to kiss him goodnight instead of going to bed angry.

"I don't want to bother you."

"It's okay," he repeats, and he looks at her this time, so maybe it is.

She's a little stompy as she crosses the floor, she knows, and she sits in a rather undignified heap, frowning at the fireplace even though it hasn't exactly done anything wrong. Fighting with Bail is awful. The only thing more awful is not being able to be with him because he's angry with her.

She's tired, and she'd like to not be.

It surprises her immensely when Fox kneels next to her, his palms flat against his thighs, his feet tucked under him.

"Breha," he says quietly.

"I can't talk, Fox." She drags her hands down her face and sighs.

"I know. You don't have to."

That's a refreshing change. She can think of few other people who wouldn't try poking her for at least one detail. She'll tell him something later, once she and Bail have made up, so he won't have to worry about their moods.

"But you can hit me," Fox continues, ripping her world out from under her, "if it would help."

For a moment, she can only stare at him. He says it so casually. There's no sadness in his eyes. No fear. Just something that looks a little like resignation. Like he won't blame her at all, if she does.

"You?" she whispers. "I could never." She's never wanted to hit anyone, but she can't imagine hitting Fox.

"It's okay," he says a third time, and she's beginning to hate those words. "I won't hurt you. Do whatever you want."

She knows better than to just touch him, she does, but what she wants is for someone to hold her, and she thinks he might need it, too.

She wraps her arms around his shoulders, burying her face in his neck, one knee hiked over his thigh so she can fit against him. His hand rests hesitantly on her leg.

"Darling, don't you dare ever let anyone hurt you," she tells him. "If anyone, ever says they want to hit you, you- you come straight to me and don't let anything stop you."

"I was trained to take it. They said it doesn't hurt me as much as it would a natborn."

Well, she doesn't believe that for a second, but she's not in possession of very many coherent thoughts right now, so she doesn't say anything about that, just holds him as gently as she can.

"I'm not going to hurt you, Fox. I just want to hold you."

Her fingers draw slowly up and down his spine, over the tattoo she memorised long ago, hoping it might help to calm him like it sometimes does after his nightmares. It's so beautiful. He's so beautiful. She wonders if he'll ever stop breaking her heart.